Sheeba brought you here.
No. You see, we fell from the sky.
It was Sheeba who made you fall from the sky.
You will bring back to us Sibalinga.
They took their children. They stole them in the night while they were
putting out a fire.
Writers and producers are:
J.J. Abrams, Damon Lindelof, Jeffrey Lieber
J.J. Abrams .... executive producer
Jack Bender .... co-executive producer
Jack Bender .... executive producer (2005-)
Bryan Burk .... executive producer
Sarah Caplan .... producer
Carlton Cuse .... executive producer
Leonard Dick .... supervising producer
David Fury .... co-executive producer (2004-2005)
Ra'uf Glasgow .... co-producer
Javier Grillo-Marxuach .... supervising producer
Jean Higgins .... producer
Adam Horowitz .... producer (partial season)
Adam Horowitz .... supervising producer (2005-)
Jennifer Johnson .... co-producer (2004-2005)
Edward Kitsis .... producer (partial season)
Edward Kitsis .... supervising producer (2005-)
Damon Lindelof .... executive producer
Lynne E. Litt .... consulting producer
Steven Maeda .... supervising producer (2005-)
Craig Wright .... supervising producer (2005-)
...
I had mis-stated myself about the show having a mess-load of writers. It instead has a messload of producers.
Darren Aronofsky as the director
It seems that 44 or 48 was chosen due to the production staff. Perhaps each one having a characature character on the show.
Still, with so many directions ... I think the show is either going in many directions or no where.
The boys and I played Jedis last night. When a Jedi had fallen during battle, he had to be brought back. How, one might ask:
0 - raspberry (blowing fart noise) onto a soft part -- belly usually.
0 - tickling
What a great world it would be if battles were of tickles, raspberries and hugs.
Later, they were tossing rubber animals into the air ... frog and lizard. When one would land belly up, it would be dead. Jared would revive it with kisses on its belly.
Charlie, patterning after me, would have the critters be sneaky and go into my shirt. Often, I would tell him a toy was sneaky and push it into his pants pocket, shrit pocket, shirt or pant leg or even a jacket pocket if he had a jacket.
His cackling really got me. It was very funny indeed!
Sadly, many companies and establishments forget this.
Dough: does it rise, does it taste good alone? If it doesn't taste good alone -- it shouldn't be used.
Sauce: the right amount is tough, but taste is critical. If it's tomato sauce and no spice or flair ... don't use it. Sauce is very critical because you primarily taste it and the cheese.
Toppings: fresh, realistically cut pieces. I'm not going to be too harsh on Pizza Hut, but the salad and toppings prep worker may not eat these toppings, therefore have an understanding that a fist-sized tomato should really be sliced or diced, not quartered.
Cheese: mix cheese together to make a nice, tasty mix -- mozzerella, romano, parmesean.
Together, these elements make a great pizza that you'll order again.
Last night, a non-franchise pizza: great dough, nice sauce (limited, as it was a little lightly spread), good toppings and layered cheese. It was a good pizza.
East of Chicago: while okay, their veggie (a type that we limited/non-meat eating tend to order) has far too many olives ... many, many, many olives.
I love this little girl. I hope that things change and that she gets better -- now!
She has an intestinal mass and likely liver cancer. Pray that these are diagnostic errors.
She's also known as: "Siddy Soo Su"
Do you want to see what underwear I'm wearing?
Is it okay if I walk my pet stick?
Now it's just you and me.
I understand there is a woman who, after having four children 11 - 4, is giving up all of them to not be a mother. Hey! Isn't that cool? You can begin a family and then just leave, for whatever reaon. I think that's super great for a child who has a parent, then doesn't. It's much like the sperm donors who seed a person, then leave before doing anything with the child. Sometimes they get away without ever having to pay money to help the child survive. Nice.
Another story: A mother, perportedly a pot dealer, had her son for many years, then dropped him off to the biological father who hadn't seen him in eight years. These so-called parents are persons who should be snuffed out, discarded like the many babies, whom they create, are. That sounds harsh, but easier than idly sitting back and letting the babies die.
I missed a party due to my ruddy sinuses ... I think I'll sue. I've have to find out what I missed.
specifically, women in some sort of material.
I'm a straight man, so women play wrestling is neat to watch. What I don't get is why vouyers would choose any of the following:
O brown jello or pudding. Pudding especially has a sheen to it, but brown gives it a poop look.
O red jello or pudding. Let's see there is the concept of blood
0 I don't find blood arrousing.
0 I won't elaborate more on blood and women, but .... I think you get it.
If you asked a woman, I'm sure if there was another way without blood, she'd take it.
O if you hope to see bare parts in the inevitable foray into quasi-lesbianism with stripping, are dark colors very revealing, nope. Is butt, nose and foot flavored pudding or jello tasier, especially under hot lamps ... no.
In art terms, try a different medium. Why not ice, long-refridgerated whipped cream, powdered sugar, candy sprinkles, skittles ... something?
Anyway ... I wouldn't blush away from a girly battle in a wading pool with mock fighting and teasing battles, but to see what appears to be two bloody or poop covered combatants ... it isn't a good visual. It's gross. I like I'd like a regular scene where I am a participant with a woman, rather than a watcher of a false scene.
sinus drainage for some may not be bad, but it makes me ill ... fairly ill.
1. When the phlegm goes to my throat, it activates my gag reflex. I then am frantic for a tissue to spit the yellowish green slime. Does it sound gross? It feels worse than it looks and sounds.
2. If it doesn't drain, it backs up like traffic, giving my a sci-fi character appearance with ridges near my sinuses.
3. During the drainage it affects my stomach, when I gag -- I have tasted vomit that wasn't ejected. When it does go to my stomach, it girgles, upsets my stomach and passes through with instestinal discomfort.
Suffice to say, I despise sinus drainage. Drying out my sinuses makes it worse for when they are re-hydrated, I'm in terrible pain until it drains again. There is no winning. Sometimes the only way out is through (in this case the illness).
I'm now on Ketech 400mg. I hope it works.
I must confess, while I know faces and know names, putting them together is a nightmare. In some years, I am introduced to 1200 students. While some of them I recognize from years past ... 1200 is a lot to remember. I think, honestly, I can put together 230 some names and faces, but beyond that ... I'm weak. I could be wrong, it might be higher.
Sader still is the cold hard fact that often the squeak wheel gets the grease or the most distracting gets my attention and I remember that person's name.
It is a wonder though when I do remember a great kid who comes to hug me. That's a great feeling!
you'll probably want to see a doctor. When a person bites, you'll definately have to see a doctor. There was a child today who, while thankfully stopped before success, tried to bite another student. Send your kids to school today, beware of biting students, never mind the roaming tagless dogs.
What people don't know is there are some diseases that can only be transmitted through such contact. They are fairly rare diseases and some, like any other rare disease, are difficult to diagnose.
Tip: don't train your child to bite non-food.
How unsurprising ... companies are vying for control to raise rates. Gosh! I'm shocked.
SBC (Southern Bell Company, now Cingular AT&T) is trying to deregulate the communication system.
Email the bugger here.
This is concerning House Bill (HB 1279).
or contact him here:
Indiana State Senator, District 16
200 W. Washington Street
Indianapolis, IN 46204
(317) 232-9400
(800) 382-9467
the price off the blades, I hope sometime.
I went to Walgreens and saw razor blades for my razor. It came out to be little over $2 per blade. What's with that? I could see that price if the company had to take back the blades and recycle the parts, but otherwise ... terrible. I use blades because electric pulls, tugs, makes me bleed and doesn't cut well, despite the brand.
I called a parent today and out poured excuses, defensive statements and finally: "I don't know."
This parent is:
(a) in denial
(b) defiant
(c) stupid, naive
(d) bound to fight physically with her child later
(e) all of the above
which one?
The child in question is not without good points, but his "being good" time duration is miniscule in contrast to the other behaviors, to which the perfunctory response is, "[another person's name] is lyin' on me."
You'd think, after thousands of responses like this, the mother would be less inclined to believe her son, yes? Sadly, that where my above question comes in important.
Couple with this, the relative unavailability to call the parent, as disregarding the class, even when put on a time-consuming project, can be disastrous. I lucked out by doing so while the rest of the class was in a special class -- Music.
++++++
In another story:
A boy, often way off, is smart, but won't work. This isn't to be confused with the spiderman dialogue, for certainly being caught and penalized repeatedly doesn't show true intelligence. I called his father, who sounded like I interrupted a high. His initial responses were off-topic, then came the geyser of excuses.
Within 6 days of my calling him, it was reported to me by faculty that his new trick was pinching girls' butts. Despite what CNN & FOX might have reported on the illegitamacy of charging an elementary student of sexual harrassment, fondling takes it to a whole new level. Why?
What would the father do, how would he react if his son was being fondled by another boy student? I think, despite any long-winded writing on homosexuality being a different classification (to which I would differ), it is harrassment and needs to be stopped immediately.
He is someone I don't think I'll want to meet when he's an adult; undisciplined, uncontrolled impulsivity, asocialism, none of which are diagnosable infirmaties, but rather developmental selfishness and ultimately evil.
I digress. I got hugs from three of the kids today which really makes the end of the exhausting day, fairly worthwhile. I was also asked to eat lunch with a student in 4th grade. How sweet! Sadly, I'm in a different building tomorrow.
Doctor's visit $70, 97 minutes.
Traveling time and waiting at Walgreens, 72 mintues.
Medicine $70
Getting rid of sinus infection ... very necessary, obviously there is a price and cost. This is not a credit card commerical.
It was the first sinus infection to really hurt. Others were uncomfortable with the drainage that activates my gag reflex, but this one couples it with pressure yielding pain. As far as I know, sinus infections aren't communicabl, but I'm willing to share.
I have been to Applebees for years now. I think that I am done. I don't see much of a reason to return. I've been there, done that. There is no more land to conquer, no big draw anymore. I bid all of them well there.
Done
Rick's pat answer, "Cocaine is one hell of a drug", followed by laughter.
From Dave Chappelle's True Hollywood Stories season 1.
Sadly, I brought it up too late. When Freddy vs. Jason was announced, I thought of a better version. My "movie" idea, was about a short flick maybe ten minutes.
Freddy vs. Jason starring Michael Myers and Jim Carrey. I think it would be very enjoyable and laughable. I really wouldn't care who got which role.
Well it's Friday. Thank goodness. I’m thinking of ordering a pizza even though we ate out yesterday. Another week of running and chasing and feeding . Meg and I are tired. We usually do the brunt of the running. I vacumed out the van today. It only took $5. It started to look like it was parked by the world trade center. Ana is in peak shape with volleyball season here. It is hard to believe she has energy to talk. If she could run as fast as she speaks she would be world class olympian. She is enjoying school for the most part.
Mike is having a good year. He is very busy with scouts and football and band. Of course we have to get the socializing in there too. The room is looking to have the affects of not being home too often. I am not sure when i last saw the floor or the closet. Luckily the room has a door that closes!! He is maturing nicely and can be quite dependable this year!!
Dave has soooo much energy he is exhausting to watch or be around. He is busy ast school with bells and peer mediation and waiting baseball season to begin for him. I think he would like to play baseball in his rollerblades. Actually this summer the silly little bunch did just that. It was great to "run the bases" he does everything with his blades. I have caught him trying to scooter and bike ride with them. He is wearing out a few angels
Jon needs a cell phone. He is mister popularity. Unfortunately his popularity does not coincide with class instruction. "I hate school, there are too many rules" I don't agree with taking away recess, that is a parent punishment. His imagination is still wonderful. Lately he is pretending to be a biker. Not good when you don't wear the pads or helmet or have the dirt to fall in. His wish for loose teeth came all at once, which makes it great for water tricks.
Megan thinks turning 5 has given her priviledges of an adult. She does not see the correlation between preschool and the unlikehood of wondering over the neighborhood by herself or demanding what is to be done in a day. Overall she is an easy child, but does get in her "flossy" moods. Tony is working like a dog still. He is tired but has been very good at helping pick up after the various activities.
I am doing pretty good. Trying to convince myself that my new job is fun. We hope you are all good in spirits and health. I better go. It is Fri and soon the house will be filled with several children bearing teeth for more food.
God's peace, our prayers and love.
Deb
_____
Quotes from Megan:
MOm, why is the sky blue, why are you called mom, why is daddy the daddy?Why, why why??????
Why are you so full of questions Megan?
Because that's what God stuffed me with. Some TeddyBears have soft white stuff, but my belly is full of chocolate chip cookies and questions> age 5
Have a agreat day
deb
_____
Michael
“The cat scan was a disappointment. I thought it would be more fun. All I did is lay there and have to be still. I thought I would do the spinning.”
“I want you to make my cake mom. The frosting from the store tastes like the lipstick I use to eat as a kid.”
Jon
“I don't like my teacher. He sat me at the 'talking table' but I sat there because I was talking and then I was not suppose to talk.”
“I need a new spiderman outfit. Mine won't let me stick on the walls.”
Megan
“Don't let me miss the bus again, I didn't have time to talk with my friends.”
Next birthday I will be having a party and the circus can come too.
Dave
“Please can I have a snowboard for my birthday. I promise to use it outside and only down the steps in the summer.”
Ana
“ok really turn it up, I promise this is my favorite song. ok turn it up, I promise this is the other so my song. ok turn it up, the boys are making me crazy, they won't stop yelling.”
Hope you had a little fun today.
deb
____
2/8/06
Those are really cute. Needed a good laugh. Thank you for my gifts. I am going to read the animal book tonight finally got the kids to the pool and to the movies. They had fun. We even attempted shopping. Didn't last long. Jon was mad as it was not toys r us. Megan did not want any “girl” clothes”, Mike and Dave were disgusted that I made them try on pants and if too baggy it is a no go at home. Ana upset that the low cuts could not be disguised well enough with a large belt. So we came out with about $39 worth of good.
Not bad for Kohs and 5 kids. Tony got home from camping. Stinky of course and tired. But a bit relaxed. I am jealous of it. Someday we will go again
One funny--- farty funny. Grocery store, 9pm. Not too many souls out shopping. Floors are slippery form resent mop. Jon and Mike chatting along in front of us. Yikes! Jon sounds like a motorcycle--a Harley! I quickly dodged into another aisle away, hoping to avoid the attention and the assured family membership. I dodged, I hid, but, of butt no; I was found. Now they are both laughing and sputtereing and making red faces. But the plan to humiliate mom literally backfires. Off to the can they run. Ha Ha. Lost them, oh wait, they found me just as I am using the temperamental self register. Oh the embarrassment, no long of the farting.
Over that by now. It is the fact that the gas expulsion has actually ruined the machine. After the grocery was paid for we go to the “look: of go back to never land.: so it was a good laugh in the care as we drive home with 3 boys singing various versions of who know what out the back sides. Oh life with boys. So illuminating! So glad I am a girl.
love you all bunches. Deb
___
March 28, 2005
Top of the Morning to You. Here’s a day for motherhood. Yada yada on the carpool, nightmare traffic, chronic tardiness and slipped appointments. More yahoo for sibling mischief and mishaps, dogs barfing on the carpet, teachers calling from school and kids asking for money and “field trip” to the movies/mall for the weekend.
Let’s move on to making dinner. 5pm. Don’t know what it is about that hour but it’s bad. Tried several ways to avoid the decline of the day going to mass can get us there at about oh the “Go in Peace.” Today though the smoke alarm went off. dinner was cooking... bubba burgers..the boys love them. well it got a little smoke filled. DON”T WORRY. IT”S A FUNNY STORY> One of the boys hits the panic button and so the fire station and alarm company is called. Yeah there was some yelling. Oh the neighbors had fun. The windows are open, the fire department is coming and Mike is yelling. “dinner’s ready” So wait it’s better. I try to cancel the fire department but they want to make sure it’s ok. Should have just had them in for dinner.
Somewhere in here Tony comes home from work. Poor guy. Turns on the TV as I say... the fire department is here! Still some residual yelling but the kids are ready to eat!
In this blurr of it all Ana drives up from work. I say..” don’t panic, but it’s frustration zone just go upstairs.’“ As soon as the fire department leaves she tells me something so precious.
Mom” I was sent home from work for talking too fast and too much”
This is so funny because to know Ana when she is on “talk mode” yikes. Several of her friends have told her they just tune out and let her go. A handy little trick we learned years ago. Unfortutaly you have to pay attention because she usually is sneaking in vital information it just zooms as fast as cable.
God Bless High School Teachers.
God Bless Husbands.
God Bless Fathers.
God Bless Children.
God Bless Mothers.
I still think it is funny.
So have a really good day.
love ya,
Deb O
Hi to you. Here is another story to make your funny bone tickle. Got a call from Jon's teacher today. .... Apparently he has been calling some of his chums "Stinky Pete". As the character of Toy story 2. He called a girl stinky several times during the day. I am TRYING be the 'professional , level headed, sympathetic mom. Really tried hard until this poor teacher says "Is it a full moon or something today? The whole class was out of hand." Jon was put to the RED zone and lost his recess. I started to laugh when she said 'full moon' knowing my time was coming around 3pm. I said I was sorry and would talk to him. Then I asked her if she knew who "stinky Pete" is. She said no. I said well it is one of Jon's favorite movies and a character on Toy Story 2 known for his expelling of gas. 'OH she says. Yep, that's pretty funny". Poor teacher. I told her I commend her for keeping her cool. She said, " I commend you for having more than one boy".
_______
Boy Humor –
Mom, farts are funny. Especially when they smell so bad you have to leave the room.
"Jon and Dave if you throw one more ball in this house I am going to take all of your balls. – Mom, that would hurt.!!"( with hand gestures frantically grabbing for their jewels)
=====
Mom did you know that in the Jurassic period they not only did not have forks and knives, they didn't have tables either so can we eat on the floor???" – Dave
=====
"I'm hungry"
"Dave, you just had a sandwich, a bowl of cereal and cookies."
"Yeah, but that was just a snack"
======
Mom, look what happened when I farted alot in these jeans. Of course there is a wear mark on the butt of jeans.
"I'm not that hungry today. I just want 2 double cheeseburgers, a salad, and fries and a milkshake." Not the happy meal. (Michael)
______
Megan" Im' the b aby, you can't spank me!!""
Jon "I am going to be the coolest kid in class, thanks mom." I cut his hair so he could 'spike ' it if he wanted with a can of mousse and a tube of gel, which of course he used!!
Dave: Mom can I play on the computer? I did my homework, scooped dog poop, took out the trash, picked up my room and put away dad's clothes and mine. (How could I say no to that)
Mike: Mom? Yes Michael. Do you have any electronic broken stuff or just anything I could take apart and look at. Dad's old computer is right here, can I take that apart???
Ana: Mom this really funny thing happened at school, I just need to tell someone it will only take a second. (And sure enough, I got a two-hour breakdown of and episode of a school day in about 1 second.)
Tony: Did you know that the stupid McDonalds downtown does not sell their (somethingburger) for.99$!!! It costs 1.19$ so I ONLY got one!!. (Wasting away to practically nothing)
Kids "Mom what are you baking in the oven?" Deb-- Ah nothing kids. Oh geez, you can't be that cold again mom. Were you born on the sun? There are aliens!! (little stinkers)
==========
April 29, 2001
Hi. We will plan on coming up for your big party. The kids are excited for it too!! Although I'll admit that only Ana and perhaps Mike understand what 'graduation' means. If it means cake and time with family the rest are for it!!!
We spent the day at Eagle Creek Park yesterday and had a wonderful time. I can't wait to go back and perhaps rent some canoes. Perfect day if not a bit chilly at 70 something. We saw some cool bird, dead fish, ugly bugs and a bee that made it's way into the van. Right as we enter the park the two girls who were in back of Tony and I start a high decibel estrogen fear scream. I nearly wet my pants. No words just screaming for what seems to be a good 5 min but it was probably only seconds. Apparently a little sweat bee landed on Megan's blanket and would not exit the car. Ana and Megan were sweating and full of tears and shaking. Tony nearly ran the park ranger over trying to pay the entrance fee and find a safe place to park.
Mike of course came up with a good, low-key response, "I think you exploded that bees head with all those screams." Megan and Ana still find no humor in the horrible flight of the bumblebee. The rest of the day was fairly uneventful, just a different place for the boys to fight and the girls to complain. Tony and I got somewhat of a hike with the kids if you count how many times we told them to stay out of the water. We would be Bill Gates envy if it paid us money. Thunder came too and is quite sore for all the hiking and growling he did. He almost caught a couple of ducks if it wasn't for that stupid leash. My shoulder is sore today from the ranks he gave it
Tony is off to Texas tonight. He goes anymore often and I'll have to get him a Bush Badge and a Texas tie and some boots. He does love the food over there. Nice and hot and spicy again. No gringo style food.
6/24/00
Unbelievable. Took the boys to a park, they found a river. By the river they found mud. In the river they found minnows and bugs and lots of ugly things. Meg went too. They went 'wading'. Now they are muddy, smell like fish and are soaked. Unfortunately we had to pick up Ana at Butler U. Me and 400 other parents with their hot, but clean children, waited for the choral to let out. Now in the sun the smell is getting quite bad. So as not to draw attentions to themselves, as they never do, they preceded to play the computer game "worms", as live people. This being a quiet game, ha, ha, all 400 some people now look and smell.
Of course Mike decided earlier to t clean his muddy feet off by flicking the mud around. It is in my hair, on my yellow shirt and my legs. Now I am home and going to go get Meg and myself in the tub, take a nap and try again tomorrow. On blessing is that I was smart enough to not bring the dog.
6/26/00
Sounds like a busy week for you. We have it easy this week. Nothing much planned. Tony has the pager this week so who knows what sort of mood he might be in. Although last week he hardly was paged. Ana's concert was awesome on Sat. Butler must be known for their music dept. The director of children's choral was also founder. Exceptional behavior and talent from all. Nice to listen to a concert in a hall and not a gym. Dave went with and enjoyed also.
Went to library and blockbuster today. Made a big mistake and rented Small Soldiers. I did not see it but was told by all that it was violent and also rated PG13. Big mom mistake. Oops. Meg was upstairs with me reading lots of library books, going potty and jumping on beds and finally after a bottle or two passed out, I think mom was first!
Never did get around to feed store, or rather grocery store. After two errands and the chaos of checking in 5 children for book club at library and arguing with Mike about appropriate books to read, then again another argument from all about movies to rent, then to bread store and hear complaints about what snacks to get, get home and quickly pass out food to the poor starving children who seem to grow an inch overnight.
They swallow the food, belch, get hungry again, and the cycle never ends. Oh to take them swimming the food just doesn't get ripped open fast enough. If we lived on a farm I think you would actually hear the cows screaming for help from above.
I guess we will see you possibly on Sun then. We will probably be at mass at the 9am service, other that that we don't have much plans
Good luck with school
Deb
I had a great laugh today. The kids and I went to the mall and Jon being himself, ran ahead of us, boys in the middle, Ana at the jewelry counter and Megan singing to herself (Santa Claus Is coming to town) in the caboose end. Just me as the adult. So I finally see Jon ahead, most of the way up and escalator and I yell to him, "Don't you dare run any farther". So just like in the cartoons he "ran " down the UP escalator and of course is not making any headway. For about 2-3 minutes he is doing the reverse stairmaster and his face is that of a bit of a panic and laughing. I could not help myself. I broke out into a big giggle and the others, other shoppers included joined me. Finally he came down and we all hugged him. It was funny. Needless to say he didn't wander nor run far again.
__________
Hello
My name is Debbie. I am a fish killer. I did not mean to start out that way, it just sort of happened. You know how these things go. For some reason they just die in my care. I try to set them free from their little bags and it just happens. They flop around on the table and sometimes on the floor. Then a really big furry thing chases after them. It must be the fact that they are so slimy. They really gross me out.
We know Debbie, we know. We all started out that way. Seemed so innocent. Buy a few gold fish for the tank. Then before you know it you have killed an entire school of fish. We have all been there! Soon your kids refuse to go down the fish isle of the supermarket with you. THEY JUST KNOW YOU KILLED THEM!! Soon even the piranha's at the zoo swim to the other side of the tank when they see you. Until finally your name is added to the most wanted list at all the Sea Worlds and Aquariums. Ed our charter member has only recently been taken off the list. He was banned from Shedds Aquarium and had to keep a city block distance from it. That is how bad this disease can take you!!
But to help you here are the 12 fish steps to keep you from your disease.
1. Admit you have a problem.
2. Attend your weekly FKA (fish killers anonymous) meetings
3. Know your limits!!
4. Read your fish care and feeding book faithfully
5. Apologize to all the pet stores, aquariums and sea worlds you have attended over the years. (a letter is good) They don't want you there anyway!
6. Apologize to all the people who have lost pets because of you. No substitute for a personal apology.
7. Learn to love slime.
8. Go to the Zoo's your fish and you classes
9. Start using the phrase I respect all finned creatures
10. Remove any fish trophies you may have acquired over the years. Especially the ones that list how many fish you have killed.
11. GIVE UP THE FISH STICKS. THAT IS IN VERY POOR TASTE
12. Make a finned friend
Follow these 12 steps and you too will be free from the fish killers disease.
_____
How are you.? Hope life is good. Marc wrote and said Joe has a job. That is great. It is so nice to see him and you have a good year. Life is never easy but maybe a little better!! Not much new here. Been on a lot of places looking for boyscout project stuff, finally found all of it and the yarn that I needed to match the blanket I am making Beth. 4 stores if not more for each project. I am NOT going anywhere tomorrow. I am going to clean the carpet, I hope at least. It is making me nuts. Tony is quite adamant about me not working, he is really stressed right now with the job and scouts and church. Just wish there was more time for me. Maybe it is better that I don't work, always have to worry about future and money, looking at orthodontists I am sure very soon. Well here is something to make you laugh
Took all the kids the Meijer's after a movies last week for ' quick' shopping. I decided to look at meat since we had none in the house. I am trying not to get distracted by all the antics the boys and Meg can do and Ana standing aisles away so not to be embarrassed. I just wanted to shop. I hear people laughing and the kids in stitches. Thinking that they destroyed something I turned around a bit angry when I see Jon with his face in raw meat, growling, teeth clenched and snarling, arms held like a dinosaur and slobber everywhere. "Jonathan!!! What are you doing."!!!!
" I am not Jonathan, I am a velosoraptor and I am hungry!!"
So I bought a box of chips and off we went.
love you
deb
_____
Quotes from Megan:" "
When the doctor touched my face she was checking my brain. (actually checking sinuses.) Ana, when the doctor checks your face, she is checking your minuses.
I have brown-cow idis. You get it if you play in the brown dirty snow. (actually bronchitis)
Chocolate chip cookies help you grow, as long as you dip them in the milk in your cereal.
When the sun stays in the clouds all day, you can't get dressed in your sunclothes, you have to stay in your jammies.
When I grow up the be a mommy, you (mom) grow down to be me. (this point she is quite adimant)
Sometimes when I sneeze, I fart by accident. But it never comes out my ears.
When it is time for me to go to school I am going to take my backpack, my blankie, my thumb and ride the bus, have lunch with Jonnie and come home.
Not Richard Pryor, but quite similar.
Charlie, when young, liked me for a playmate but more often as a toy. What I mean by that is, that he would insist that I stay in his bedroom while he went out in the living room with the adults for something. Toys aren't supposed to up and leave ... how rude! His tendency to keep me apart from anyone else and not share me was silly.
Monkeyjack described this situation much like The Toy, with Richard Pryor, however in this case I wasn't bought like a slave. Charlie also isn't a task master.
One time, while I was pushing him on his swing, he said, "[my first name], I love you!" How could anyone not be melted?
Monkeyjack reported to me Saturday that there is an alien infestation, as he and Charlie have been battling them for weeks now, unabated.
My nieces had many, many, many (not exaggerating here) Barbies, dolls, and tons of clothes for them. On one of many occasions, the basement was a backstage fashion show. Dolls littered the floor as did piles of tiny garments. Mum, who loves birds, wanted to hold one of the birds. These birds (tiny) were social, but picky.
They would start on your hand, but much prefer to be on your shoulder / neck (how piratey). In order to hold them at the fingers, despite their timid pecking of your fingers, you simply put one finger over their talons, securing them there.
Birds are not known for their etiquette and so one let go.
Barbie, halfway under the sofa and half exposed, really one of tens of them, looked up. Sad for her that she got a parakeet facial. Splat! If ever anyone wanted to make a political or comment against Barbie, this bird one-upped them.
After that, she looked more like a Cruella De-Vil, white streaks, colorless face or a Kabuki actor.
Gross, but quite memeorable.
My neices got a bunny each one year. They were very cute! It just so happened, when they visited, excited about the bunnies, that I was cutting up broccoli. I prefer raw veggies to cooked ones. The rabbits and I shared this.
Well, while resting or hopping around on the girls chests as they laid still, they happily ate the broccoli and summarily peed and pooped. Wee little bunnies have small discharges, of little concern.
Later, while the girls were finding ways to play with them, they often allowed them to roam around the floor where they would find neat things to chew. All rabbits chew and sometimes aren't all that considerate. I had some t-shirts that had particular pits and holes from their ... chewing. The origins of chewing are manyfold, suffice to say, it is something that rabbits continually do.
That being the case, Mum, hesitant around the rabbits announced to them that,
If one of these bunnies bites me, youall gonna git it!
That's funny, because she has no southern drawl or speech. She still carries Pennsylvania Dutch colloquialisms and some Pittsburghese *.
I believe that my sister, who got the rabbits hoped for one of each, but I think they got two females who humped each other for dominance.
To further this Doolittle Tale, we introduce birds. The basement smelled, well ... ripe. We couldn't forget the turtle and the frogs.
-- T.B.C.
* actually, there was a published book How to Speak Pittsburghese
As this rap is winding down
As you can see, we wear the crown
Perhaps I can use a dog bone instead (followed by stuttered, crazy laughter)
Remake after remake after remake. Well, well, well. It looks like Hollywood will have to find real writers. I stopped seeing many movies years ago, some other people including family are quite disenchanted with vomit films (films that make you want to vomit). Let's face it! I am not interested in doling out $7.50 (Indiana gets off cheap) for a piece of crud.
The last movies in the theater I saw were, well ... weak to bad.
Fantastic Four -- clumsy as it was stupid
Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire -- pulling out the pictures, forgetting the words. If I saw it only as a movie, perhaps it wasn't too terrible. As far as a story relevant to Harry Potter, it was awful.
--- brainstew --- I don't go to the theater often, so another movie -- I can't remember.
In a previous post I mentioned Peter Jackson and his love for Greatest Story Ever Told epics. I mention this movie because it is 6 some hours long. The Lord of the Rings, while adapted from an in depth collection of works was, well ... long, boring. Here, the director for Harry Potter should have stepped in and cut out the New Zealand tourism parts ... mountains, very lovely. Oh wow! Bogs! Enchanting. Hey, look! Isn't that the ocean (surrounded by the ocean), no. It's digital. You mean with all of the helicopter footage, you don't have a single scene with real ocean? What kind of travel video is this?
Knowing the general stupidity of people, I would expect visitors, seeing the dedicated village (Shire) set in New Zealand are upset to find out that there are no leprechauns in New Zealand, nor Hobbits, nor Elves, nor Trolls, nor Orcs, nor Wizards nor castles. What a let down!
BTW: anyone who has read the books &/or seen the movies could sense the awkward relationship of Sam and Frodo. They had mountains ... could have been a prequel to Brokebackside Mt. No. I think that the madness of Tolkein didn't go down that path. I use madness in that anyone who wrote volumes equaling the library of congress had to be a bitty nutty.
I bought my verizon wireless phone on the net 13 months ago. The error was that people within my hometown had to dial the area code for a long distance number. I never understood. I only wish I had addressed it quickly. Apparently when you type in a zip code, that is immaterial to the logic of number selection. It chose one within the area code, but nowhere near my zip code. Nice.
I called a verizon wireless place in town. They gave me the info number to make the change -- my only solution. The rep helped me changed the number. What a waste.
That reminds me of punching in numbers for a credit card or something else only to have a person ask you the same [insert colorful metaphors here] numbers! We're still not on the same page with customer interfacing. The system gets the number and does nothing with it ... ho hum ... yes. That's very nice ... please hold.
"What's your number and name", a voice prompts you.
"Hey, Soo! I must have slept on a cactus last night, my butt really hurts!"
"Yeah, yeah, yeah ... mine too Aug (snicker)."
"Gee, Aug. Could you use a good back rub after such a long day?"
"Nothing says old wild west like 'Kansas City Faggots*'".
Rawhide, backside ... what's the difference?
Did you read the story? Uh, yeah ... after reading Ann Rice's flaming gay vampire epics.
It's just something about the branding, the roping, the donkey-punching, the spurs, smell of leather, whipping, and horse stalls.
Why am I writing this insulting crap? I don't like that the commercials they air still don't plainly say ... "GAY MOVIE!" Don't omit the truth, don't lie about it. If you get harranged for it, then you asked for it.
"Group Sales" -- ha!
Focus Pictures -- out of focus.
* courtesy of Blazing Saddles, a great movie.
Perhaps I'm overgeneralizing, but I think if you don't like something, you talk about it or use other methods. Sadly, I was slow at typing this, but doesn't it seem that many people react with violence rather than banter or chiding?
Granted, depicting any religous icon in demeaning ways will bring hostility, but I don't think violence is necessary -- just an excuse to be violent. I would liken a cartoon much like graffitti. Is it really that terrible and unwashable. Granted, like anything else, there are costs and penalties, but killing people not responsible? I don't see the corelation.
Perhaps MR was right about a select few being able to take a joke and not start swinging.
I think about the L.A. riots where a bad verdict was the "justification" for mass looting, murder, arson, rape, assault and other crimes. Huh? You stole to protest something in which you had nothing vested? I don't see the connection there. The people who steal, destroy and slay do so, and would do so without a reason. It is merely a cover to commit wrongs and crimes.
As for Finland. I would suggest that it was like Clinton lying about having sex. The right answer is, "yes". Their right answer before or directly after the publication should have been, "Oh, man! We are so very sorry. The people responsible have been sacked." Once there was murder, to apologize to murderers -- uh, no. Don't say sorry now.
I sit alone at the bar ... waiting, ever waiting...
I recommend March '06, regarding the Oyster Awards
Conumer Reports online
Our master got angry with our last droid and had him disintegrated.
I used Turbo Tax this year and they charged me more than they should have $60 instead of $40. It looks like Tax Cut will get my money next year. Sorry, guys. Rob me once and you're done.
Introduction:
Many of these stories are first hand accounts. There are duplicate stories from previous posts regarding Max and Cali, cats of Monkeyjack. In some households there are are then two pets, so the inclusion of others is inevitable, regardless of the mix of species.
The family cat Stubby. Stubby, a runt and outcast of his litter was a farmcat. The family there was trying to get rid of the kittens in favor of expunging them. I remember seeing this little cat walk along the gravel and being given the word, "that's him". His tail was shorter than most cat due to some kitten injury. We got him home, and in this case I got to experience what cats tend to be like in a car -- electron comes to mind ... always moving, chaning everything's energy level when it touches them.
He was a small, but mighty cat. The dog, Princess, had a mortal enemy -- cats. Here, one enters the house and is entreated to stay. The first two days were great fun for the dog and cat. The cat ran around -- good exercise for a young cat. The dog got exercise chasing the cat. There were no reported injuries.
That did't work. The dog kept eating the cat food, to starve him out. That didn't work. After seven days, the dog wandered into the kitchen, looked at everyone, now with the understanding that the cat was going to stay, and peed deliberately on the floor.
Throughout the rest of his lttle life Stubby went on many adventures. The backyard was relatively free of any life, except for maybe ants. He killed birds, squirrels, rabbits, bunnies, moles, chipmunks, moths, butterflies, bees, wasps, nearly anything that moved. Spiders were slower moving and not much interest unless they were on the wall.
I remember many mornings letting him in or out that I found a "tubuluar" package on the cement. The prone position rodent was in full rigor, looking almost turd-like. This was a token, unspoiled, not ripped open, just killed and presented. There was a difference between that and a close (within visual range) hunted kill. Usually these were more like Predator kills, with their heads or limbs removed, disembowled and messy. Noticing some, there were clearly four types of kills:
peckish killings, with organs eaten
gaming killings, with several moral wounds
playful killings with grotesque pre and post mortem wounds and attacks
token killings with little damage to the body, presented so that humans would respect him
Also a treat were the scrapes and cuts and bloody wounds consistent with the tough-guy-on-the-block. My father thought we spent enough money on him to be a dependant for tax purposes.
He was super silly on catnip -- go figure and loved to climb. He didn't like to climb down.
My father once had a solution to his "tree" problem. He was in a neighobor's pine tree which wasn't ours and it wasn't good to climb. We begged him to help Stubby. He got out the hose. It was rational. Which did he hate more, climbing down or water. He hated water more and found a way down. The Bluejays, whose nest he inteded to raid were delighted with his leaving.
Sadly, I saw the most difficult thing with a cat -- slow demise. He developed feline leukemia (intestinal) and he was in pain for the last few months on his life. He died, crawling to my Mum ... dying in her lap. My father, usually saying nothing but sarcasm about the cat also wept. That was a rareity.
Before his passing was Princess' passing. She was going blind, but her one-time enemy, later friend walked beside her, making sure that she didn't bump into any walls. He was a seeing eye cat for her. It's funny that you apply compassion only to people, when no one was there to train him to walk her. He did that on his own.
-- T.B.C
Jake and Sid:
Before Charlie was born, Monkeyjack and Lori and these two silly companions. When they were out of town they would ask me to house and dog sit. I accepted. The problem was when they returned. The dogs were bizarre when they got home ... they came home late and had stopped at McDonald's. Jake was shaking and Sid was spinning around. What the -----?
eledteacher! What did you do?
I, uh ...., uh ....
What did you do?
What do you mean?
We got home and they went crazy! Did you give them something?
Maybe.
What? Do you feed them something.
(Finally, it clicked. I understood the conversation)
Yes. I got them, a ... um ... hamburger.
A hamburger?
um ... yeah... each a hamburger ------------ and fries
You got our dogs combo meals?
yes ...
(loud at this point) No wonder they were crazy! Jake was shaking like he was having a seizure. He was waiting for his burger. eledteacher, you are a bad, bad man!
Sorry.
To tell my side of the story now, I knew that they were, "tired" of the kibble fare. They like car rides and we went to ... a fast food place ... or two ... and got food there. Jake happily rested his head on my hand while I shifted gears. Well... how do kids react to having fast food, despite it being cheaper quality than burgers you would and could make -- they are ecstatic.
Sid also snatched a piece of fish from a tray when I got Fish of Stroh. I never knew dogs liked fish. I think she just figured I didn't have to bother serving her ... she'd just serve herself.
Sid, officially named, Yensid, is a whitish German Shephard. She's wily and wooley and big and loud. According to Monkeyjack, she's convinced that the postal workers and squirrels are colaborators in a syndicate to bring about world ruin for dogs. To this effect she always barks at the postal workers, Fed Ex, UPS, DHL, etc. She has found dead squirrels that have been tossing toys and has killed a few. I think she offers no quarter to birds either. All animals are subject to termination, especially cats (right prey size perhaps?).
Anyway ... one early memeory of Sid the puppy was her nipping my nose. Sad for me because prior to this injury I had a septum puncture that opens up every now and then giving me nice, bloody noses. This was just such a case. It wasn't her fault, she was a puppy.
She started small enough to fit easily into a bathroom sink. Now, she's large enough to push others out of a kid's wading pool. With her tail usually erect and her watchful eyes -- she loves to play. Out of jealousy she destroys Charlie's toys. She doesn't like to share ... nor did Charlie. I think he's getting over that now.
Sid had an old-man playmate Jake, who insisted that he ran the roost, though he was much, much smaller. He was the same height for a few weeks, then she grew. Later, he would easily run under her. He taught her to distrust postal workers, how to chew on people, if necessary (she doesn't employ this, but just escapes) and how to "sample" drinks and food left at the right height.
Sid loves beer as much as the dog from Strange Brew. She's an accomplished beggar and, while distrusting of Charlie, she vultures around him while he's eating because Charlie drops some food and intentionally offers some to her. She loves doing walks and used drag Lori around while she was on roller blades. While I walk her, I feel like a sled being pulled along by her.
She hops up to the door, her face in the window to see who's at the door. The are around the window is ... um ... bare of paint. It is intimidating when you hear the barking and then the face at the window. It reminds me so much of Marmaduke comics.
I used to call her "Baby". I so often used this that Lori pointed out that if I didn't stop, she's think her name was "Baby". She still greets me in the silly way she always does ... happy circles running near me, but not quite to me ... many figure eights. Then I get to meet her. When Charlie was an infant, I had to greet Sid outside because of her grand greeting of me. So silly!
-- T.B.C.
Maia, meaning mother, perhaps is mother of that which is silly. When over at MR's house, she jumped up on the sofa to sniff through my pockets. While I entered bearing beggin' strips, that I tossed onto the floor for her, she insisted that I must be hiding something better in my jacket. This was not the first time that she checked out my jacket.
On a seperate occasion, my jacket moved up and down, as though life were entering and leaving it. Upon closer insepction, Maia was rolling it and tossing it to gain access to pockets.
Her more typical trick is to "misplace" a toy under the sofa or table or in small space behind the chair. "Woof! I don't know where it could be. Woof! I can't quite reach it, though I put it there. Woof!"
Really, she's MR's dog -- he should write this.
I wasn't going to write it, but it's just too funny not to write it ... sorry I beat you to the punch on this one Dave.
When they were looking at the house, they found some ... peculiarities. One error was a sagging basement ceiling. While the excuse doesn't bear out reality (positioning of shower), it is nonetheless, memeorable as "No new taxes" and "What's the definition of is?" -- trapped in a hard place, lie!
Well, the ceiling is warped because one of the teen boys fell asleep in the shower and plugged up the drain with his butt.
A very comical lie. Sadly, it was the only given explanation as to the ceiling problem.
Thanks Dave!
Titan, bold, hyper dog of the century. A good and well meaning dog who never thought of himself other than a dog. There was a neighbor dog, Eli a taller, longer Great Dane, I think, that liked to race Titan along the fence. There was no serious animosity between the two, merely typical rivalry and show-boating. On one occasion, they stood ready and aiming at each other.
Chicken was the game, or perhaps headbutting sheep is a better description. Either way, they agreed at a dog-perceived signal that the time was, now! They ran full-bore at each other and collision! They didn't hit each other, but rather a post, along the fence that spearated them anyway. Ouch! Dazed and confused for so long it's not true -- for them, it was. "Uh, we meant to do that."
Titan, so bold, even flying dustballs were his enemies and he would cry to you to make them. CDs were great, as they would shine a nice rainbow on the walls to chase. Any game had to do with chase!
There was hide and go seek. A group would walk along with him, then split. He would panic, then scramble to herd everyone back together again, whining the entire time from panic ... must get sheep together ... must get sheep together.
He would drop his toy for his two humans, but for nearly no one else. JF, my neice, his ... cousin? was the only exception. For her, he would jump, run, do whatever. She never needed to shout, merely say, platz and he would lie down. It was comical.
He favorite thing above all was river wading and swimming. Ah, creeks, rivers, streams, anything muddy and foul-smelling. He loved it and would swim for a day, if given the chance. His other dream, never accomplished was to chase the llamas next door. Oh ... they look so good to chase. Please? He chased deer and other critters, but ignored birds entirely. Bees, wasps, flies ... they were "good eatin'" Spiders, not the best critters for the humans there, neither of them liked them, were also interesting fare, when he could get them.
He was never able or intersted in catching the thumb-sized mice that were in the house during the winter.
He also didn't destroy a stupid little ragamuffin of a squeak toy dog that bit him. He was on the sidewalk walking when a speck of a dog bit his leg. The owner quickly fetched the dog announcing the dog's sheer stupidity in attacking Titan (meaning large / mighty anyway) who could have chomped it to death without thinking.
As far as fast food -- I think he preferred Burger King.
-- T.B.C.
unorganized, but so are dogs -- sometimes.
the following stories are based in fact, but some details are sketchy, many are from first hand or second hand accounts.
-- please note initials represent real or pseudonyms to protect their identities from laughter at work
Thunder (short for Thunderheart) while wonderful around people, for he thinks he is one, doesn't like many other animals. Squirrels are great to chase, capturing is great! Dogs must always be assailed with torrents of angry barking.
The folks were visiting my sister's family in Denver. Typically, luggage is "late" really misplaced. At three a.m. loud pounding resounds on the front door. [loud pounding] (continues while Thunder snores, back against the door). TO gets up, not wanting the kids to wake and goes to the door. [pounding continues] TO has to push Thunder out of the way to open the door. [Slide ugh! Opens door to unhappy airport delivery guy and takes baggage]
This same dog scared the pants off many people not knowing him. He's a long, black Shepherd with a taste for ... human
food
To this effect, Thunder has conived people out of their food, so that he can eat it, never bothering to chew, then suffer gastro-intenstinal problems usually culminating in fire hose diarhea. "Fire hose" in two senses; visually spraying, then the need to spray the area after he goes.
Also what makes this dog special is patience. He has often trick-or-treated with a costume, been Barbie -- worn make up and had his nails painted.
He was also called, Sir Marks-a-lot, in that nearly any standing object had to smell like him through urinal or fecal means. He also wasn't to be outdone when the boys, while hiking in Colorado made use of "outdoor plumbing". He would hastily make sure it smelled like him too. He, probably like most dogs invariably wound up smelling like the family because of walking in a stream ('enough said there).
Also exceptional is his "bad tennet" status in kennels. Normally this would be attributed to those who trash their rental or those who, in some way warrant their eviction. He was evicted / denied access to a large number of kennels for the following reason:
"He wouldn't stop whining and crying just throughout his stay. I've never heard of eviction from crying. His belief that he's a person lends himself to believe that he should not have been there. His crate training also brought on teeth injuries, trying to eat through the cage.
I guess they should have just resigned themselves to believe in his perspective that he was a quadraped human.
To his credit, he has also been "too sore", "too tired" to eat. The kids have brought handfulls of water to him to lap up and handfulls of kibble for him to be hand-fed.
-- In this series, all stories are presumed to be continued
I went to MR's to watch the game.
This was on HDTV -- clearer, better. I didn't much care who won.
I did like some plays, including the cheat of Steelers getting their first touchdown, which wasn't.
I was also watching the commercials. There certainly were some stupid ones like:
Diet Pepsi and P. Diddy, "Brown & Bubbly butthead commercial"
The sex between city-destroying beast and city-destroying robot yielding an H3, stupid and sick to think about it.
Whereas they didn't have costume malfunctions, they did hint at it with ABC's Dance With the Stars. "See partial nudity here!"
I liked the, I suspect expensive, Fed Ex commercial in the prehistoric era.
I'm sure the hidden Bud commercial will air again, but I thought it stupid and it isn't a good beer. The Bud commercial I did like was the underage clydesdale pulling the wagon. I guess they had the costume malfunction with the naked lamb/sheep not Boundin'.
During the half-time I was hungry. MR and I ordered a half/half taco pizza meat and meatless. They messed up when we got there so they gave us a medium no meat as well as the large meat pizza.
During the phone call, there was a strange noise ... perhaps, more on that later.*
MR noticed that the Steelers have a Predator on their team, hence their winning.
It was good to know that Michael Jackson was not featured.
The opening groups, sad to say were hastily run together -- lacking professionalism. I like Stevie, but that rush, rush, rush thing ... not good.
Ivan Neville: typically takes the National Anthem and makes it his own -- cat scratch chalkboard. The singers were not a good sight. Surprising was the complete group of MVPs from 1-39. That might be the last year they can do that, as some were in great shape and others didn't look too well.
Another suggestion to people who aren't listening: dump John Madden, not a good speaker and not a good commentator.
*"There's always a disturbance with you." -- Spiderman 2
Charlie, while at Dave's last night; was daring the ouch game. You know, skating around in precarious action/inaction waiting for that thrill of possible injury -- better when it is others.
In this game, he was wheeling around on a scooter in the wood fishined kitchen around adults with exposed toes -- no shoes. I found myself to be the only victim.
Coupled with this was his illness, his cough, at the same (illness) stage of William's, who was also coughing a bit.
Not to be outdone, Andrew spit up a few times -- babies do that.
I expect either contributions from MR or Monkeyjack on this one.
Reynolds (first name, unimportant). aka: cubby, flaming carrot
in other circles: psychopath
I thought that I'd never hear of him again, but five years ago his nephew was in the class I was teaching. The nephew was allowed to birng in a special person, in this case his Uncle Reynolds. The nephew had his mother's married name -- I never made the connection until I saw him. I was ... uh, awestruck. He had only a short time to talk with me apart from the students, where he told me of living in the "Big Apple", managing a sports store and having been mugged at least three times.
Reynolds. Hmm, how to talk about him. I suppose that he wasn't always bad natured, but really odd -- outgoingly so. Because of him we have such phrases as, "I didn't order it and I'm not gonna eat it!" (a story told to me of when he was at a local Mexican restaurant and refused loudly to eat the beans. Later that night -- I think, he also stated), "Crunchy taco time!!" (mashing his meal into a pate' then eating little of it.
Another night at the same place, "analingus" -- you put that together, I think you'll get it
When playing D&D, "I want to cut off her face and wear it around." (after slaying a poor hapless innkepper not integral to the story)
"Meaty boy contest" (who is the largest fattest person here)
I think we all know of scooping water (32 oz cup, back when it was a fast food craze to give them) and splashing your friend's face while he's telling a story.
Being so obnoxious at a party that they tie you to a tree, and you arent' set free until well into the morning despite your plaintiff wailing.
Puking, still having the smell on your breath, saying that you'd still work on drinking all day, regardless of this minor setback (it was 10 something in the monring).
I think if you ask enough people there would be stories of setting fires, torturing animals and other derrangements.
He hasn't off'd himself like reckless Rowe did. It's amazing!
Talking with him long, you found his favorite topic was him and how rude and socially crude and offensive he could be -- even about you.
Back in the time of the BBS, there was a site Might and Magic. On it, there was a jousting game, that you could play once to thrice a day. Later we found that it was like a carnival game -- rigged, "in favor of the house".
Either this game or another, "Cubby" lost a round to another person, "Prydaine". His prompt return to losing was typing, "Twist my [rooster] [ryhmes with witch]!" Assuming he was playing against another guy. The 14 year old girl was ... well, offended.
Stomp, Stomp, Stomp
The Idiot Convention
You say you want your own state?
I'll give you a state; a state of unconsciousness
We just want to have a (interupted voice) festival ... (trailing off)
Fun you stupid idiot! Master! (from Metallica's Master of Puppets)
Ah ... the entertainment.
The band, an actual instrument-playing band is Rolling Stones, supposedly. They won't have costume malfunctions, but might have sleeping problems or candid rudeness from, lets say -- lyrics. That being the case, it will be better than parading lip-syncers to music they didn't write, trying to dance on a 15' x 10' stage.
Moreover, Bon Jovi wasn't chosen, so that makes me happy. I'll have a nice day then. I do not Bon Jovi: in a hat, with a rat, on a train, in the rain
I don't care for either team, so it doens't matter which one wins.
It was a nice party. I got to finally see the house. It looked nice, roomy, charming. They must have done a lot of work on it, especially when he described the maintanence; lack thereof, of the house with its previous owners. It was great to be there.
I got to see Andrew; cute, lively, watching everything and everyone. I didn't get a chance to hold him though
William was interested in playing with others, also easily captivated by Toy Story. He has cars, but the helicopter was truly neat!
There were tasty treats -- that I should not have had, but they were yummy!
It was very nice to see people all around. It is a quiet neighborhood.
There was a person in question, regarding movie roles: he is David Warner; staring in Tron and Time Bandits.
As I age, I doubt that I am less angry, but my "anger gives" me "focus". There was a time that my so-called rage was free-floating (not unlike free-floating anxiety; also similar to general anxiety disorder), but rather than a disorder, it was a character flaw rather than a true psychosis or mental ailment. Now that I am old, only minorly wiser, I find that there are indeed injustices that are worth of anger and attention.
I remember that there were times that my aggression was easily diverted to any number of questionably rational ideals including my homophobia at the time.
There was a time that I was quite homophobic, during the BBS days trying to garner support for the Legion of Fag Haters (or something like that). It was at this age (maturity not chronological) that I was most susceptible to cults and mob-justified crime including murder. I had a wonderful group of friends who were gay-stomping, though a few agreed that homosexuality should have been a punishable crime. Two critical things happened in my life to permanently alter my perspective on violence.
1. In my youth I tortured and killed invertebrates endlessly. It was enjoyable. I happened along a frog in the yard. It was at this juncture that I could have ended up like Rowe. I was sixteen, I think, and I held a large knife (old military knife I found at a school) over the frog. I dropped it probably about six times before it hit the poor frog. It sliced a back leg, but it didn't injure it terribly.
This would cinch me into a typical psychotic / asocial category save this; I felt terrible and nearly cried for the frog. I had a well hidden and buried conscious. I had done so well at hiding it, I found its strength in returning, painful. After this, I could not comfortably injure any animal. Much later (15 years, perhaps) I have an even greater preference for not killing when possible. I set free spiders and insects rather than kill them. Perhaps it is because of guilt or because I do truly feel that there is a reason for their existence at that time -- spiders eat insects that serve other purposes -- cycle of life and continuity of nature.
2. Had I not been introduced to people, who later on were okay people, and further on were openly gay, I would have felt justified in my hate of them. Ignorance has a way of verifying assumptions. To this day, I don't have any really close gay friends. If I'm wrong, then I am. Anyway, more to the point. Having found out later that people I knew for a while were gay, I had no real reason to hold that against them since it didn't change who they were. With this I relented my hate and animosity. My worries and fears of gays stem from very young years, and certainly not improved with some of my childhood experiences and neighborhood friends.
My folks weren't homosexual bashers and, since they grew up in bigoted households and couldn't stomach it, they weren't going to raise children who disliked supposed groups or categories of people. For this, I am very thankful.
My self-destructive tendencies, though general wild stupidity, were nearly suicidal; based for some years, though I doubt that I recognized it. Having grown older I am a bit less reckless. I have no suicidal tendencies and have been known to wimp out on many things, merely due to the safety or risk factor. I don't gamble (various reasons for that) and am far less of a risk-taker.
Wow! I am mad. It's amazing anyone around me is around me.
If not now, later, when they are obnoxious ADULTS.
I had J'Lyn and Grayen both at odds with me. My solution, divide and conquer. That worked, Grayen being the greater offender, I removed him.
Look out for these two in their teens -- news, I'm sure.
or best fit.
Rowe (first name, unimportant) met a sad end after high school, around 6 months after graduation. Ohio has different rules for alcohol and establishments than Indiana. For this reason a dive touts enterance to 18+ persons, being given a paper writstband indicating legal and non-legal drinkers. This is interesting in theory, might even be good, if the people were faithful to that policy. The place had no quams about underage drinking, since those checking ID, saw that it was roughly rectangular and had a picture and letters on it. Honestly there had to be 14 year olds there too. Worse still, 30-year olds. Drunk 30 year olds and yonung teens -- so gross, it should have been nuked. Anyway,
Rowe apparently was driving back, with other underage drunks in the car. He failed to make a turn and flipped the car. It was my understanding that he bled to death, pinned under the car, his "friends" fled possible arrest for 'minor in posession'.
This was an anti-climatic end to someone who made a mortar for a class project to fire a tennis ball. He enlisted my help to put things together. He had to make due with what he had -- and he was alive because of that.
He read a munitions manual for a book report (sound crazy yet? Other stories will confirm it)
He made a mortar from cardboard tubes and socks for stuffing and wadding.
He used an electric start to fire it.
He carried the weapon just outside the school. I plugged it in.
[Foom!] Words don't describe the volume of the blast. People exited rooms. I ran around the corner to see his vanishing act. In seconds, like Copperfield, he was gone in a large cloud of smoke. There was an odd print on the window of the door. We later found out that it was melted sock that didn't come off the window.
I opened the door and still no Rowe. Finally, coughing hacking, he was there. What no one had scene is him rapidly dropping the large shattered firework and putting out the fire on his arm. He suffered second degree burns. No one remembered that he wasn't trying suicide, specifically, but rather "launching" and tennis ball.
He generally brought some weapon to school, showing to a select few -- no one really wanted to know. As far as I know, no one picked on him, he was just bizarre and a loner. Had he lived, he would have made news for crime no doubt.
He also palled around with RC (not likely to be mentioned in any later post) who openly made anti-Semetic comments and once nearly blew up himself and Rowe by playing with a live grenade.
I guess I posted this because this was a route I could have taken -- the road less travelled, for a reason, leading ultimately to destruction of others and self.
a kid who had bangs longer than the fullness of my scalp hair, I imagined him thinking: "I like hair in my face." (song-like)
"Swats", corporal punishment for wrong-doings. I never got one, but that was employed on several kids while I attended.
Art teacher; nice but wacky, suffered a debilitating fall on steps leaving him mentally incapable of teaching. His nickname for me: Howdy Doody, because I have freckles.
M D (probably never to mentioned in any other post) had a preference for silver and gold paint markers -- nasty and messy. I remember he always had some mess on his desk somewhere and on his arms. Later, this kid couldn't come to school because of a bad acid trip.
At least six different incidents of me getting hit in the groin, usually during P.E. One such adventure was attempting to block a soccer shot. I jumped up and it was only chest high. Well, with the jump, it hit me square in the nads. I fell onto the ground, was pulled off the field and asked the stupid question, "Are you alright?" No! I wasn't alright. MR was there and was heartily laughing.
MR invariably would fall asleep during any movie or slide show during science.
The same "I like hair in my face" kid would sometimes turn around and look at either MR or me or both and mumble, "I kick you [sic] butt"
I remember being pretty much Beavis or Butthead throughout, well before that series was on TV -- "stoner", "rocks", "hard" -- all with stupid laughter.
I also remember the report on 60 minutes referred to masturbation as arousal from "touching oneself", which I didn't quite comprehend being genitalia, but rather anywhere. I thought it odd that someone would moan at the touch of an elbow.
There was a foul-tempered math teacher who made grass-growth fascintating, but not math.
MR had a notebook with the collection of his, not-truly Schultz Peanuts, in say ... XXX form.
There was a teacher there who wore short skirts and was very curvy. What? What do you mean I'm teasing the hormone-strong animals? I'm not doing anything but getting their attention. "Uh, Mr. Murphy? Would you come to the front and give your report." "No thanks. I'll take the F."
I remember the underpowered computers they brought into the school and that people had to learn to use the "Card Catalog".
The P.E.T. Computer. Tape storage driven, with a Mac-like fused body and screen. The keys were as solid and stiff as an electric typewriter's, the screen a little larger than a wallet.
I first met MR in middle school. I also met TS there too. His wonderful opening statement to MR and I was, "Hey, Frog and Toad." Charming!
MR was the first person I ever met that actually took the bus -- as I walked to school Elementary and Middle.
This was also the period of the great egg toss.
There was Reynolds and Reynolds teachers -- not related. The woman Reynolds was young and, well ... quirky. Public knowledge of her biker (or cyclist) boyfriend lent us to make speculations.
Whunh was there. She sat in a group with MR and myself. Another tidbit of middle school humor:
Fjord: a body of land mostly surrounded by water (I defined it as me, a guy, in the bathtub)
This also spawned "Fwank!" c/o MR -- the sound reverbarated when farting in the tub; to which most people can truly attest.
I took the folks out today for lunch. They ran into an old neighbor from when they first moved here. She can talk exponentially. My father stated, "I thought that we'd be here all afternoon."
It reminded me of Lord of the Rings, "It takes a long time to say something in Old Entish, so anything worth saying takes a long time."
What I predict for the short future:
escalations in the Arab regions will eventually plummet the world into terrible factions.
There may be more than two groups, but ultimately it would break down to two groups. I see one separation being Muslims and non-Muslims.
At that point with emminant warfare ... nuclear weapons would be employed breaking the population into scattered parts. Presently the world sees the US as, gennerally a bully. The arab world is unstable and with instability comes war.
With war, unending, there is a "winning" solution, nuclear warfare wherein your "side" could "win" by having the greatest number of population not immediately killed or (17th-18th century concept) winning by holding the ground -- area of contest.
I would predict this to be within 22 years, unless stability within the arab regions and the US improve. The US is too petty with partisan battles to realize that spending money abroad, especially in the arab region doesn't bring money back to us. The last many administrations and congresses and senates have not spent money domestically for many improvements.
Welfare -- gennerally doesn't work and needs -- trashcanned in favor of a new system. Overpopulation in the jails & prisons can be simplified as per person expenditure well exceeds anything spent on welfare.
Too many poeple -- too few exectutions. A more proactive, pre-emptive strike on groups, like proposed by the administration could limit the money presently spent.
Crime, now an adult, can be controlled with selective striking so that no other generations will go on. This will ultimately appear to be another tribal conflict being of the poor versus the rich.
It was long in coming.
[this is funnier if you saw 40 Year Old Virgin]
That Fine Young Cannibals dance of leap froggin you did!
Shane Johns -- wierd turned to gay
Stories of hide and seek with male roommate when showering. Gross, nasty, eww! Later had gay child porn...
wow (Ben Stein voice here)
Whuh! -- a name given to someone who was, well, with a large posterior before it was hip.
Fffpppttt (fart sound) -- from her stupid, criminal-esque boyfriend
More later
first ... that isn't the real name, but the pseudonym will be used throughout:
Wilma is living with one or two guys at the time that she is introduced to our group. It was my understanding that she was "sleeping" with one, but ended that, then was "sleeping" with the other.
At this time she met Scott. He had her over, not really knowing what a ciniving witch she was. She flirted with Monkeyjack. She then was with ISJ, similtaneously with Scott. She met up with MR and that was three of our group. She expressed interest in Krista too.
Now that you have a bit of an understanding, here comes the the relationship part. There were factions going on him against him or them ... oi! It was ugly! We were petty and it brought division and 'betrayl' to the group. In the end, the group was weaker but alive. The intruder is ridiculed, but there was a lesson in it ... keep friends true.
The flake and fake -- nasty character is still in town, but I think wise enough to know she isn't liked.
I was out of the mix -- I was intersted in her -- momentarily, but she wasn't in me. All the better, perhaps.
More stupid things I miraculously survived:
Climbing up a ladder and trying to duplicate coyote running in mid-air, then falling onto not-so cushy lawn furniture pads.
Swinging on vines in the local woods -- including having it snap mid-swing, sending me falling 8' onto my back.
In the same woods, firing randomly at things. I fired at a tree, the bb hit something and it came up to my eye -- within an inch, then fell to the ground. I was convinced that day of the phrase, "You'll shoot your eye out!"
Bumper skiing with a person who doesn't tend to stop if you've fallen.
Ridning on the backs of cars
Riding in the non-existent trunk of a Fiero (hot engine that I had to avoid touching), so the trunk was open and I rode in it until a stop sign, over hills and bumps. I was desperate to get out -- I nearly left it while the car was moving.
Mixing a batch of alcohol and water so that I could hold fire! I didn't actually get burnt with this, but it was stupid. On the same day, I blew up a butane lighter I found.
and my lust for lust
Also downtown was a 18+ (no alcohol) strip club. I did like going here and it was about 1 block from the Other Side.
Deja Vu was a chain, headquartered in Flint, MI (later dismantled by stupidity). It was tied to the mob, a woman manager (undercover officer) finally got access to files, linking illegal funding (laundering of monies), thus closing all the clubs.
While in I business, I was keeping it in business. I spent / wasted lots of money there on strippers feeding my lust, but not fedding my lust -- I didn't ask for anything extra, and they weren't going to give it away -- nor accept if I was stupid enough to give to them without it. Suffice to say -- (approximate figure) $5000, perhaps went to that place. What a waste!
Despite all of that, I can say that I never had "relations" with any prostitute.
This was about an 18 month habit. After that -- I was done with it.
My then-sister's-fiance wanted a bachelor party. His friends, one of my brothers-in-law and I went out to such establishments. They found it comical that the strippers knew my name -- many of them. They all just looked at, whom they thought was a clean cut guy -- in shock.
My lesson: it ain't worth it.
This here's a tale of some frinds who were duped.
There was a closet homosexual, or at least I didn't know he was at the time and an openly bi-sexual woman (her tale will be told later, hopefully through the many sources MR, Scott, Monkeyjack, & others, maybe).
These people I will give -- pseudonyms: Fred and Wilma
Monkeyjack was with me when Fred mentioned there was bar that people 18+ could enter. I thought it odd, but went along with it. It was downtown, which should have been a clue. Wilma drove in her compact manual.
We arrive at The Other Side. This wasn't too secretive if you knew the inside. We walk up to the door, several couples are leaving. One runs out and effeniantly calls out, "Wait! I forgot my purse!" This guy was a fellow graduate whom many thought was gay. It turns out that he certain was at this time in his life.
We enter -- I was homophobic and rather nasty about my dislike and pronounced hate of gays. All step further didn't make the night better. Fred paid, then Wilma paid the cover charge.
Monkeyjack walked up and dolled out a $20. It was at this time that the cashier was clearly high. He made no response to the $20. Slowly, he recognized it as money, but had to search 4 minutes to not find change. He asked someone near him for change. It was painful to wait for the stupid guy.
I walked up and handed him another twenty. Forgetting that he looked before, he routinely looked in the same places, and also had blank periods on non-movement. Finally he called over someone for change, having not found enough in the cigarette box in his sleeve (50s look).
We proceed and Fred hands each of us a drink.
What the ____ is this, I thought. I held it not wanting to drink it, thinking that getting drunk wasn't the wisest of choices. The further we went, not a well kept place, by any means, we go to the main room, somewhat divided into seating and dancing.
We sat.
I looked around and saw, typically people talking and dancing. A guy was dancing by himself wearing a purse, others were group dancing -- charming.
At one table I saw women around my age at that time ... cute, neat
they kiss
[next]
We sit there and I'm very uncomfortable. By now I have slugged the drink and wanted to leave. Monkeyjack, not as uncomfortable as me, wasn't ready to leave. The time we went wasn't random. The floor show started around 15 minutes after we arrived.
Before that, I had to whiz. I wasn't sure about that. I was happy that there wasn't a long line of urinals nor stalls. Perhaps, it was more horrifying. There was a men's and women's. In the mens was an airline size restroom. It had a toilet and an undersized sink. The door had a thin interior door and a screen door. God knows why -- better not to speculate.
The wood door didn't have a lock. I did lock the screen door with the nice hook
With my back / butt to the screen I used the toilet as quickly as possible. Faster, must pee faster!
Stupidly, I felt so uneasy, I pulled out a boxcutter from work ... cutter in one hand, putter in the other. I finished and rinsed in icelandic cold water -- sans soap.
I returned to my seat mortified.
The floor show started. I looked for about ... 2.2 seconds. That was long enough to see a red sequinned something, I think with a blonde wig. I stared at the table for the rest of the time.
Wilma had expounded later on how she was jealous of their legs, these dancers, drag queens.
The lip-syncer was walking around, singing and I understand, nearly sat on me. Monkeyjack grabbed my chair -- saving everyone from a nasty battle scene. At that moment, I didn't mind being Monkeyjack's b____. After that singer, I left asking absolutely no questions -- hurriedly, angerly!
Monkeyjack called after me ... "wait!" I wasn't. "Wait!" No ________ way! He caught up to me with ... importantly, keys!
"Can you drive a manual?"
"Yes." What I failed to complete was "badly, terribly, not really."
I stall it 15 times trying to reverse.
I stall it 20 more times going back to Monkeyjack's house.
I never took it out of 2nd ... ouch!
I would have felt bad about it, except she was a nasty little character ... deceiving, lying, using (more later on "Wilma")
I picked up the two in my car, about 90 minutes later when they called.
Bad evening, but one from which I wasn't hurt or harmed, just scarred a bit.
Dave, his pregnant wife Jen and son Will were moving. While they had moved a great deal of their things, stuff was still there.
They asked for volunteers for the job. I wound up having the day to help them.
Their house was mostly empty. The obstacles that were the most difficult were:
the sectional sofa that, even with four beefy guys lifting it was, well, a challenge through not narrow stairways. The practical solutions was cables run over like straps, carrying the section gurney style. I'm not a beefy guy, those more able were the lifters there.
Piano. It wasn't too difficult, but if you haven't lifted one, especially without the wonderfully available piano movers, it is a "treat". The piano is long and the ramp onto the moving van was not long enough to be a slow incline.
The packing went well. Some things were there long enough that -- one forgets how to disassemble them. It was, uh, interesting ... the crib took some thought.
The best thing to move, most of all, was the cement planter, which Dave was, I think, not so happy to have to take with them. I think it was only 4 x 4 feet, like 4 tons x 4 tons. With all of us lifting it onto a truck, it was still an unhappy move. It could have snapped under its own weight.
Their transitional move went okay. I wasn't able to help them to their new home.
Monkeyjack, when in high school looked like a middle schooler. He also looked young. This once enabled him to get out of a ticket -- looking like a new driver.
I looked old in high school. Monkeyjack's early-developing cousin thought I was thirty-five. Boy! His cousin was not a good mix with horny teens. She was young, 14, but looked, well ... curvy. Too curvy for a 14-year old. We were around 17-18.
Monkeyjack always got carded and I never got carded. I still look about 5 years older than I am.
In that I looked old enough to buy, say liquor, earlier than I should, I never took this opportunity. I was too scared, chicken, whatever.
Oh, wait ... yes we did!
Monkeyjack and I were the only ones to have Apple computers in 1988. So, we were intersted in file-sharing, that's how we met.
Hey, who's [my name]?
Look for the guy with his shirt open with a full beard and hair hanging out. Keith found me with no problem.
While file-sharing, an inspired thought came about ... why not start that wad of paper on fire?! Why not then?
Light ... hold ... ouch, fire! Fire! Fire!
Run to toilet flush the fire. Wow! That was pretty stupid.
I only went there twice. Circa 1990?
It was late, we were all hungry, probably in the north part of town when we all went to Denny's. Good food -- not present. Service -- tardy. Stupidity -- common.
Most memorable was EM talking about a fun thing with holding your wrist in pain with "boisenberry jam on it."
Boisonberry, how very common.
EM is also known as, the close talker ... uh, hey! Could you like, not be 4 inches from me when you talk?
He also had a brother who I saw twice. His brother had the Joker character from Full Metal Jacket, 1000 yard stare. He looks like someone you wouldn't approach.
In most school systems there is the fragility test of protecting an egg from certain disaster when dropped. The students each have a couple of days to put a raw egg in a container to protect it from a fall.
Enter factor two: a teacher who, doesn't like you. She is the teacher for this science class.
MR had the misfortune of not being on her 'good' list. I didn't see it, but he reminded me of her special glee in flinging it horizontally to gain momentum having it destroyed. Gee MR ... you get an F. Thanks for the fair assessment!
She tried mightily to cast mine to the same fate, but it survived somehow. I talked too often and found her class to be ... uh, boring. I was probably deserving of her animosity. Frightening as that was, there was a common substitute teacher for her: Mrs. Burk, who we lovingly called Burp. She was loud, foul, and hated everything to do with people -- my perspective at that time.
Fianlly, you throw into that class, when alternately reading sections, M C who read much like grass growing. Syllables lasted days. Reading a paragraph was, well, not necessary punishment for us all, really.
Really, there is a science in it. First, realize that eggs splatter in a wide pattern. Eggs, no matter how fresh, stink immediately after opening and they don’t smell any better with age. What to do; what to do? I know! Let’s play egg baseball. If you haven’t play this game … try it!
First, the batter should be well protected from the spray. I had an old shower curtain – that’ll do! Stand and get your proper stance.
There’s the pitch! Strike, an unceremonious death of an egg.
Pitch. Hit! The hit looks like the end of a comet! It spray everywhere, barely touching the batter. The pitcher, me .. was wearing some. MR called for another egg.
I tossed it and MR hit it with fury. The spray went farther – to the porch – not bad!
I believe I tried it and the egg all went on me. I stunk, both in talent and in smell.
At some later time, I grabbed some eggs and tossed them to someone in the lawn through the back door. Their catching it was astounding. TS tossed it back. I dodged it deftly and it splattered on the linoleum. I laughed about it. TS walked in and MR was there. They were stunned by my comic running in place on the slick of eggs the lay on the linoleum. MR claimed that it seemed like a minute of me constantly running trying not to slip on my face or back. I succumbed to gravity and fell backward. I wasn’t awarded applause.
