God's sense of humor

I finished reading "Fight Club" and I make my last call to where I will start. My clothes:
black, black, white

I am Jack's nervous twitching eyelid.

Fighting book

"Fight Club" by Chuck Palahniuk. I watched the movie first, which jaded me to the movie. I would suggest this book, even if you watched the movie. There are some differences. There is a charcter oddity, the narrator has a hole in his cheek that doesn't heal, has had emergency surgery, but is squeamish about putting medicine up his butt to keep him awake and Tyler asleep.

It is an odd novel and I would liken it to part Stephen King and part Dogma.

Set to fall

I predict that Obama will fall out of the senate having not put enough time in for sessions. He'll be busy trying to ensure votes for President, then he'll not be re-elected because he didn't do enough in office. Then the word will be that it was bias, but it will fall back on the fact that he was led to believe that a senator with limited experience could make it to President. It wouldn't be a racial thing, but not enough time spent in senate (twice over).

Obama ... bow out now, pursue it later. It's the right thing to do. Show who you are and if people really want to vote for you. Hillary ... send all of your money and the moneyt that Bill got to the party and run someone else. If I were a republican (I'm not a party member), I'd say run and fall flat on your face, as you'll likely do.

McCain ... run! I still haven't seen much from the Republican camp. Guiliani ... not sure on you. Since I wanted McCain instead of Bush, I think, so far, I'll stick with McCain. Liberman will get many moderates, but not the ends. I think he'll pull from both parties, so run ... why, not?

Better still ... do popular vote with 1st and 2nd winners being President and Vice President, regardless of parties.
Kill the electoral college. It is crap.

If you can't figure out the voting machine, you probably shouldn't vote.
I once saw a webpage on "Should you vote". There were many, many, many people in it. It suggest that at <75% accuracy, you don't vote. Interestingly, many were in a particular party. Huh. There were a few I failed because I don't know entertainers. I might live next to one and never know it.

end your surplus money

lend money to someone to end poverty, just some person? I don't think so.

Thank goodness it wasn't ...

choke the poultry ...
beat the bishop

MTV's Remote Control

Man! I'm old.

one more stab at Batman

Well, Batman: Another Run at It is due in 2008 with Heath Ledger as the Joker. Joaquin Phoenix is wise to stand back from him. "Where does he get those wonderful boys?" + "Two thumbs up; way up Buttman."

The Joker left a clue:
Roses are Red
So is my butt
I'll **** on your ****
Cuz I'm such a ****

What the? What's he under that mask, mascara?++

+ Bob & Tom parody of Batman, "Buttman"
++ "Thank You Mask Man" by Lenny Bruce [youtube video]

How I imagine the end of Harry Potter 7

In Return of the Jedi, Vader sees what a sadistic foul creature the emperor is and grabs him with his remaining mechanical hand and throws his lightning shooting butt down the vent shaft giving the space stationa a brief power surge and nothing more.

There would be Voldemort killing Harry and before Harry's quite dead, they group or a single person kills Voldemort. Voldemort still gritting his mismatched teeth (not Ralph Fiennes, but his character's) while a spell is erupting around him.

"You alreayd have ... you already have", lingering on the mouths of those around

he's got no class

I heard a radio announcer Thursday night claim, "I like Steven Segal movies. He had a movie that was (stumbling for the phrase) direct to DVD. What's up with that". Uh ... are you serious? He was. He likes Segal movies. I guess there are some people who like hangnails, but I think they are rare. What a nutcase ... or make that two.

celebrity wars

Whereas "the Donald" and Rosie are battling, how about we up and call the stakes and the players?
I suggest we do fantasy fights, like fantasy sports.

Trump vs Oprah ... who can liquidate more assets to charity and go broke then shut up?
Rosie vs Paris: who can match the other person's weight the fastest wins the other's cash.
Mel Gibson vs Tim Burton: make the shortest, most comprehnsible full-length movie ever
Kansas vs Utah: produce the smallest number of zealots
Boston vs San Francisco: have the longest running hetrosexual pride festival


more later

hands -- political

with the art of negotiation, it is said, things get done. Let's take, for instance, seatbelts. Seatbelts weren't the law. There were comittee meetings and senate and congressional pork bellying on a law making it a requirement that all auto manufacturers build them. That's common ****ing sense! Why debate it? It peeves me that there was pork belly on the bill passed. That, right there is a great example of the bullcrap in politics.

Let's see ... it generally saves lives ... huh, I don't know. I'll sign it, if you alot some money to this thing here, having nothing to do with helping people.

That's how politics work. It should be: hey, this saves lives. Make it a law. Great ... a two-page law requiring that seatbelts be mandatory. Simple.

Liar's club

MR posted about Hillary standing by her decision to blame the President Bush. She "can" use this defense as long as people nod and agree. Sad to say, the President is not infalable, but he is held to a higher standard, fair or not, than most other people. He is the leader of the free world. He holds a significant title and responsiblity. He is held to higher standards.

Most people don't like war. It is unpopular. Regardless or moral rightness to defeat "the hun", leading people into war is a bad political move.

Americans were less against Afghanistan than Iraq, because there was a direct link between Al Quada in Afghanistan and the September 11th attacks.

The buyer's remorse on voting for war on Iraq is not interesting, but typical. Again, what the whole bill that was passed isn't clear. What is clear is that the bill directing war with the terrorist regime, some of which is in Iraq was signed.

Unlike any previous war declaration, there is a borderless entitity, as it were, of terrorists that don't have Islamistan as a territory. This doesn't make it any clearer or more correct to the average Joe to say ... okay, get the group.

Because there is not Islamistan to bomb quickly, troops are spread out and trying to fight undesignated people like in Vietnam. Vietnam was poorly executed on a number of different levels. There were lessons to be learned there and in the Kuwait war. Somalia should have taught other lessons.

Here America is the number one supporter of the war. We have no one else to fall back on to help us. We knew that going in. Since we thumbed our noses at other who would not help us then, we don't have their support now. We won't get it.

Going back to the beginning, politicians backpeddle and lie. Really? That's shocking! Politicians claiming they were duped, unbelievable. Politicians aren't to be trusted? I can't hardly stand it. Really?

The next thing you'll write is that the U.N. is corrupt and is full of self-serving politicians. That would never be.

Politicians lie. They all lie. I don't like politicians. Why write that they shock you that they lie? Why would anybody be shocked that die-hards believe liars? "I want to believe" is the motto, not only of X-Filers but of die hards for politicians and politics and parties. They want to believe and are then have to defend that person or their faith in that person.

Hillary, bad choice. Obama, bad choice. While Bill Clinton didn't have business ties to give favors to, he never met a dollar he didn't like. He'd lie to get another nickel or power.

Yes, I noted my favor of his Presidency, but he was a schiester. He was a more open liar and obsessed with power. I think the economy being better during his presidency was the "carrot".

He might have "missed his chance to kill Osama", but I don't know what he knew. He didn't put a whole load of troops into a war that brought more American hostilities (or worsened them). I think, this is why I think of the years favorably.

Clinton is a liar, power-hungry, but I felt safe and we weren't engaged in a very complex war. Our economy was good and had war been inevitable, I'm sure that he would have cheesed over people and charasmatically charmed them into his thinking. Therein is his power. Clinton probably could have talked his way into getting other countries to join the war.

He would have had a long discusion about it with committees, probably wasting much time.

Politicians will lie to make themselves "look" better. How else can they get elected, re-elected, and do the talk circuit and book deals? The problem with American has been said, "too many lawyers". If you take a look at the government, what is the percentage of congress and senate that are lawyers? I think you understand what I mean.

I wouldn't want them to not know the law, but clearly knowing and following are not the same. "What do you mean by taking the bribe money out of my freezer that you saw, on video, me take?" We need to held government to higher standards, not just the President, but people's claim is ... America doesn't need a whole lot of change.

I disagree.

keywords

I have marked the three lines of rather odd or uncommon search keywords

cheers again

I checked again at how Earthlink and Brightmail are saving me from tidal waves of spam. Thanks!

Vegan indignities

If you live a vegan lifestyle, you're like an addict, having to justify to others and yourself why you choose that lifestyle. I am not quite a vegan and don't have to justify to myself at all. Most meats smell to me like what it is ... seared meat. It smells bad, not quite as rotten as roasted stomach, gall bladder and spleen, but close. If people ask me why I don't eat most meat, it's because it stinks! The better part of eating sensation is aroma and smelling.

Imagine white-laden asparagus (notes of strong bacterial growth), recently discovered months old mushrooms and/or past shelf life cottage cheese. Now, you could cook it, cut it with other ingredients, spice it, but it will be bad and smell bad. You could not get it to smell good. Beef, while I used to eat it, smells really unappealing. Poultry smells fouler still. Pork can sometimes smell okay, but I don't eat it unless it is in a heavy-cabbage eggroll. If you eat eggrolls like I do sometimes, you generally are eating pork and chicken.

I can sometimes eat hot & sour soup, but this too is beef broth with chicken broth, soy and chicken parts. There is some sliced tofu and mushrooms, but it is a chicken based soup. If it is heavy on the soy and stronger on the tofu -- it can be good.

The sad bit of some people is that they try to escape meat -- like a "catch me if you can", but loose the hide-and-go-seek game. If you give up on something, then crave it, you will always lose out. You should limit things, but not cut out things that you crave. I will eat a couple of bags of chips if I don't stop myself. I therefore will eat chips sometimes, but I won't buy them more than a few times a year. I didn't make it up to the lake cottage this year, so I avoided them there.

I don't crave chocolate thankfully, for most chocolate affects me badly. If I do get "peckish" for it, I try to find white chocolate, which affects me much less. Dark chocolate also affects me less. I know that some people avoid meat because it was once alive. What a foolish notion! Most everything around you is alive. Because it has a perceivable face doesn't it make it greater or less.

I suppose, with that thinking, if bunnies had faces like slugs -- they would be "good eats". Thinking more about facial symmetry and similar construction, wouldn't most things be off limits? To take this approach, which some do, would require supplements that would cost mucho money. I know there are third-world populations that are vegans, but I'd like to underscore third-world. Indians have what kind of mortality rate? Africans have how high of a mortality rate? This goes beyond warfare.

Some cultures don't eat meat for religious purposes, but they also don't have a lot of food around. If you reversed policy and said, "okay everyone, eat anything that crawls, walks, or runs", you'd have a shortly thriving culture. You'd then have burn out because all of the slower critters would be diminished in the area. Trying to get people to go back to a vegan diet and lifestyle then would be impossible.

In commercial fishing, there are years and decades when the call is, "No more albacore. No more abalone."
Does that mean you don't get any more orders for them?
No ... there aren't any remaining here.

Since people in the US have access to a global food market, it is reasonable to use that access to get a wide range of food, meats included. It is proven that children need lots of protein and minerals and vitamins found in different meats. People can survive without them, but they may not thrive. People should give their children and themselves the best chance at survival and eat what tastes good that is nutritionally sound. I almost want to wrongfully correct people sheltering their children from meat because it once had a face.

Be a vegan for the right reason, not because it once had a face. I can understand you want to limit the amount of processed or overly processed food. Those who want to help cute critters , well ... there's a toy shop there ... help those stuffies from being chewed.

moor bweifing

I got a call ... "we need to talk about when to start and I have a couple of questions."

I'm happy to get the call, but "more briefing", it's unclear what wasn't said. I had hours with these fine people. I hope that the questions are insignificant. I also hope for the following:

I am offered position
Agreed salary is correct
it works out for all parties
my car survives the next few weeks
my life and heart stop skipping beats

Good use of space

Welcome. This is in Lafayette, IN

What had been Shoe Carnival is now a "soul carnival" of sorts.
At least the colors make it look festive.

reflection of the past

In my late teens and early twenties I had a schtick (ha ha) about saying, "Why that's my [male genitalia]". My (think "OPP song") joke went on and on. I applied it beyond logic. So, now long in disuse, I bring back the 'my member' joke.

What's that on the roof? Why, that's my member. (read matter-of-factly and knowingly)

lounge act

Cheyenne, it appears really hates to be on the sofa, near people. Monkeyjack used her as a pillow for a short while.

insert your story here

Here, we have a scene. Generally, I would be the one to warp this but I'll give that opportunity to others this time. The question is, what is really going on in this picture?

bad drink

bad drink
Originally uploaded by MDH, II.

I poured a tall glass of gas treatment, then found it was for cars. What a way to start a night.

News Damnit!

I was talking with MR and he suggested that MSNBC was slanted more than even CNN. That was surprising as I thought it was more evenly critical. There is no American media that isn't on one side or another of the teeter totter of bi-partisan politics, so you have little choice but to get sided. He mentioned a TV program with some guy. I quickly interjected that I don't watch it, I read it.

Today I thought about what the difference is between reading and seeing. There is a great reason why news wants you to watch. First, you see advertisements which pay bills and make them money. Second, seeing and hearing is more personal. You feel almost engaged in a conversation, but you aren't. You are still the passive listener. Even, like zealot fans jeering the game, if you argue with that person -- what's the point?

I read the news. I can read other sources and scrutinize and better extract the important, factual work. There is no "evil theme music" online or print. There is no animated bombs or bouncing faces with text. It is more difficult to influence you without the deceptive media (intentional or otherwise).

Entertainment news should have the required label of not news, but "gossip". Paris Hilton seen reading three pages of middle-school level book --- more news on E!.

How to disable TiVo

Take away the remote. There were the five adults wandering around the house desperately looking for one remote. It flatly didn't exist anymore. The likely thieves, the puppies, were innocent. After twenty some minutes, Monkeyjack shoves his fist, once again, into the sofa cushions ... he felt something hard. Like pulling Fat Albert through a manhole, he held aloft the Excalibur ... TiVo remote. The TiVo is completely useless without the remote.

The lost remote was found near the cushion, "it wasn't me ... wasn't my fault" where Lori sits. Despite claims of innocence, the evidence is against her. There is no penalty, but she, Amy, JJ missed out on valuable time to watch Ghost Whisperer ... TiVo-less.

JJ later comfessed that it wasn't really her show. I know that it isn't my show either. It is a woman's show and there's where I step away. It will likely air on Oxygen or Lifetime later.

bad means good

James Caviezel, who played Jesus for Mel Gibson seemed to be limited on roles. Now he can divorce himself from Gibson with irreconcilable differences, but lacking palimony. You'll get to see him in other movies. I guess the nice thing about the growing intolerance is not having to deal with 8% of the lunatics. While the other 92% are still around, we at least shrugged off some of the louder Hollywood asses.

Rememeber boys and girls, if you ever do anything bad, blame drugs. Even if you haven't done drugs in a while or ever, blame them, then you are free from guilt. Oh, the alcohol did it. Oh, the drugs did it. I really don't feel that way ... it was the drugs, they made me do it or say it or write it.

Don't think less of me because it was the alcohol. While I too, have been an ass while I was drunk, I have been blessed by friends who haven't called me out on it. "You were a total ass when you drank" is what I should have heard. Herein, you have a compassion for those around you. I suppose there is the difference. If all the world is your stage, then you get the limits of compassion and aggression from everyone you show.

If you're afraid of being an ass ... don't go public; don't go into entertainment.

To my friends,
Thanks friends for putting up with a dilligent ass, putting my best foot forward into my mouth.

World Trade Center

I'm not a good American here when I write, "this movie wasn't very good". While it showed the trauma on a body when a building is slowly crushing people, it is for drama purposes only. I'm not a big fan of Nicholas Cage and you get to hear quite a bit of him. He and his partner are port authority officers and the story is really about a small team that enters tower 1, it colapses, crushing many ... you see the slow death and terror of a building on people. The story is not much on the towers themselves or other people per se. You see the families of victims, but mostly the two families of the two "featured" officers.

It was better constructed than Ladder 49, but was mostly drama. I thought it was something different, so I was disappointed with it. I guess if you watch it expecting nothing, you'll be surprised to get "something". The acting is, so-so, and the ultra drama of how does this affect our relationship. That to me, seems, chick-flick. You know, if I'm trapped under 300 pounds of rubble, my knees broken and only my bust exposed, I wouldn't think deeply into relationship issues. Gosh, if I die, how will that help or hurt my marriage? That's a stupid question. Never once was it, man ... I wish I could be with the kids again. You knew Cage's character he had four kids, but you really only saw two.

Peña's character had a dispute about an unborn child's name, Alyssa, no Olivia, and again. That was the nagging question in his mind? I've never been at death's door, seeing a glowing Jesus carrying, what looks like a water bottle. I would like to think if I were dying and really nothing could stop it, that I would think about what I'd like to do if I could remain around the people I love. I don't think I'd continue arguments about names, numbers, dates, politics. I'd be angry and sad that I would like end my time on Earth and would then only be able to watch them and not able to interfere -- helping in my own flunky way.

Strange as it is ... World Trade Center is 64% chick flick. That is how it made it through the gamet of would-be and batting cirlce protesters.

and a word about genitalia

When children grow, they often openly discuss genitalia for they don't find it offensive. There is no taboo rating on it, until a "magic" but random age when "let's not talk about that, shall we ... it's rude". Until that time, you can hear wonderful stories about kids noticing differences in mommies. "She is taller", "she's got a bigger butt", "she has big boobies", might be some talk of the children.

Last night, a couple of event really will not soon leave my mind. A less-embarrassing event was Jared's, "I don't want them (the dogs) to smell my 'pee-pee'". I understand that later he was worried that they might bite it.

Both Jared and Charlie were armed with nerf-like guns that fired a nerf dart with suction cup. They had fun firing at each other and then at other items. The game got "great" when they hit the wide target of my butt, not once but repeatedly. "Ow! Ooh!" I complained, as if hurt. They giggled having shot me in the "bum ... the bottom."

They each tried to circle around and circle a more vital area that I sheltered with hands and a criss cross. Earlier in the evening, I was battled with lightsabers, swords, and random toys flung at me. One item was a lightsaber, that from a lofted bed's height to my fallen-on-floor position, landed square into my groin. I was lucky that it wasn't that heavy and it didn't have much speed.

I was also "sliced" and stabbed in the "balls". "Balls" was quietly voiced. It's funny, because Monkeyjack, in whose house this was happening, has a little story of saying "balls" quieted. The story is, though, "have you ever noticed that [Monkeyjack] lowers his voice when he says balls?" This was when he was young and his mother, bless her heart, despised vulgar language. Better still, I heard "lowers his voice" and followed up with a more baritone version of the "balls" not necessarily quieter. It stuck.

To finish off the genitalia stories ... sorry, Monkeyjack, you can write about it later -- better, there is the story of "adult game".

The two dogs there are brother and sister, both fixed. They have tons of energy and would tear the house and each other apart in their play and dominance fighting. Charlie saw Echo humping Cheyenne and later recalled to Lori that he saw them doing "adult games".+ Jawdrop and stunned. Both Monkeyjack and Lori, separately want and don't want to know what he means. Charlie exaplains what he saw and then says no more.

Oh ... fudge (the other word, perhaps more appropriate)! So, nearly a day later, either he submits an amendment to his statement or he is asked again, he suggests Conga dancing, like at weddings and the like, as the "adult game" they were playing. Whew! Otherwise, the TV programming they anyone watches will have to step back from PG to G, I suspect.

There is another story, far more embarassing, but I will hope that Monkeyjack sometime writes about it. It is a guy thing gone wrong. Boys will be boys will be boys, and then you have a situation, a mess, and the lesson was learned by incident rather than lecture. I might much, much, much later write on "pee pistols". It's a guy thing ... nothing gay about it, just embarassing.

+ Monkeyjack later revised it to, maybe "human games". Charlie once stated, "girls play with dolls; humans play with games." So there is the distinction between humans and girls.