Consumed

Sometimes I feel much like Hercules, where problems-hydra swallows me whole. Despite my valiant effort to lop off the head, more problems arise in it's place, either of equal size or equal ferociety. In the end, despite my strength and would-be skill, it is luck and naivity that saves me.

on whose side is it?

Blog this photo

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Flickr or blogspot is failing me, sadly not for the last time.

stupid, funny humor by late night

“Oh, sure, you can have snakes on a plane, but shampoo and toothpaste...forget it.” --David Letterman

….

“David Hasselhoff was arrested for driving under the influence. Cops thought Hasselhoff could be under the influence when they noticed his talking car was slurring its words.” --Conan O’Brien  

 

crooks and crocks

Dear [my name],

Our human resources department recently viewed the résumé you have posted online. We are Next Generation Solutions, a national advertising, consulting, and marketing company. We help our customers find online solutions for their advertising and marketing programs. I feel you may be the right candidate for the Advertising Executive position that we have available in your local area.

An Advertising Executive will work with our creative team to develop marketing (online and traditional) strategies for our clients. Our clients range from small businesses to Fortune 500 companies. Strategies include advertising and PR campaigns. Our goal is to provide each client with a custom solution to meet the client's goal below the budget the client has set.

The person we are seeking must be creative and be able to think outside the box, yet cognitive of real world budgets and client objectives. We are looking to provide clients with campaigns that bring results, not awards.

We offer the following compensation package:

• $65,000 annual base salary
• Quarterly bonuses based on performance
• Medical benefits
• Tuition reimbursement
• Rapid advancement opportunities
• 401-K
• Paid vacation and sick leave

If you feel this position may be right for you, please click on the link below and complete the online application:

------- from the same company -------------
Dear [my name],

We are Next Generation Solutions, a company deeply involved in national advertising, consulting, and marketing. Our main focus is to help our customers find online solutions for their advertising and marketing programs. We are searching for a tutor to fill a role at one of our client's main sites. Our human resources department saw your résumé online and referred it to me as a possible candidate for this position.

A tutor will have the responsibility of working with a number of clients with varied interests and acting as a mentor and authority on said interest - whether it be a student preparing for a major test or a housewife interested in gardening, we have a wide variety of open positions for people who are clear, concise, and know what they're talking about in a given field. The ability to express yourself in a manner that is easily understood by others when not face-to-face will be a key to success in this challenging position. You will be able to work from your home office and this could also lead to a management opportunity with our organization.

We offer the following compensation package:

• $22.50 hourly salary
• Weekly and monthly bonuses based on performance
• Medical benefits
• Tuition reimbursement
• Rapid advancement opportunities
• 401-K
• Paid vacation and sick leave

If you feel this position may be right for you, please click on the link below and complete the online application


.........
Which one would you take? Are they legitimate?

Hospital fling

Mother had PT and hated it, but apparently did very well. They didn't have her do it in the afternoon. Her friend, Betty, came in while Betty herself was in hospital. Her daughter Patsy was there. Betty is unsure about moving to rehab hospital. Mother seemed optimistic.

She was in good spirits, but was very sore. She liked her first meal today -- veggie lasagna. She favors the diabetic sweets though, pudding, cheesecake. She did more time on the auto bending machines. Her pain is less, but her work is greater. She is to move more and has a series of exercises that she is to do. She has a tendency not to do them. I believe that she now realizes that the PT (physical therapists) are not the enemy, but rather assisting and insisting.

She hasn't really slept, so that hopefully is in the works tonight. She doesn't watch TV as much of it is crud and crude. She gets pestered at least every hour, usually more often.

Father, needing a break, went golfing today. The weather was continually misty today, but they all went. He was to follow that with poker. He hinted that he may not make it all night, but would try. He is still looking groggy and sleepy.

I found the hospital courtesy wi-fi helpful.

I haven't slept well, but have higher hopes tonight. I started blinking around 12 something last night, but this morning it felt like a large stone on me, holding me fast to my bed. This come, leave, come, leave bit doesn't make it any better. When she's off the ICU, I'll rest better. Visitors will get to stay. Her blood pressure is still too high, she's still getting nitro drip -- increased tonight, and her blood sugar is 200 + every reading.

She'll be here for a while.

Botany Bay

Botany Bay
Originally uploaded by MDH, II.

Damn! I've got to get out of there! I think that this year would be a bad year to be a male teacher. Hey, he touched my scalp in a wrong way! I think that he's flirting with me when he calls me up to the desk for my poor test grades.

under arrest

under arrest
Originally uploaded by MDH, II.

Another pedophile arrested, this time in FW -- teacher at Cantebury Green. He likes little boys.

"Senior Pastor Ron Allen of Heartland Community Church, 1025 Vance Ave, where Smith previously volunteered and helped youth pastors, said he believed the allegations will be disproved.

“This is old news,” said Allen, who noted everybody works in teams at the church so nobody is ever alone with children. “I knew about this probably since 2002. This is going to be a non-event. When I talked to the people in Kokomo, they’ve said if there was anything to the charges, something would’ve come out of them in 2001.”"

So, this pastor knew of the allegations in 2001, then went ahead and kept him with kids. Five years later, the same kid comes forward -- lie, perhaps not.