Heathen to heretic in just one book

My sister regards me as a heathen and I guess that I am. I don't often spout religion and in a week ago post, cursed like a sailor, but generally am tame. I don't go to church -- mark of evil, surely because only good sinless people go to church, right? Put God first, but act in a selfish manner, which is what I often see people do. God died for your sins, so let's do some sinning! It irks me that I am labeled because I don't get on a denominational bus. Well, you can't be getting there, can you if you aren't on a bus.

I tried to speak on religion with my sister, but she's on a pedestal there, untouchable. Sadly, no one is close to perfect and to believe so is a lie. Anyway, I know well enough not to discuss it, for my rational mind finds illogic in some steadfast, near or dead center fundamentalist thinking. I do not discuss books or nearly anything religious or Christian based with her. Our father didn't adhere to this principle.

He read a book that really defined evolution as the only reasonable conclusion one could make -- including macroevolution, while the author maintained his Christian beliefs. To my sister, it was like holding an orange flag cheering for red team. In no uncertain terms does she find evolution heretical. There couldn't be such a relationship to things, yet she does concede that some parts of the bible are difficult to interpret, though her sect has the only real meaning.

There's where I would come in and be heretical, but I held my tongue. Sadly, my father's on the religious **it list for thinking and speaking and hearing evolution. It, after all, has e - v (o) - l (more letters) - i, which rearranged spells evil. Sad to say those same people could not see that it also makes live.

pulling an R2 move

The energy company suggests, that if you remove the safeguards on consumer protection, consumers will win.
[click and it's done]
Hey! Where are the competitive prices; where's the supply; bring back what I had before!
-- safeguards, what safeguards?
The ones we had on the books.

R2D2, of course suggested that the restraining bolt be removed so that the secret message remain secret and that he could wander off into the desert at night in persuit of Ben Kenobi. Ultimately, it cost R2D2's friend, an arm.

Hezbollah has an idea

Hey! Lebanese troops! Why don't you go down to the south and create a buffer between Israeli troops and us. Doesn't that sound like a good idea? Yeah, you see, we'll be behind you -- way behind you. Get them to gather in a circle and we'll (strategically) strike them. Some of you may not come back, but you'll be grand martyrs in the halls of Hezbollah, right under the carpet.
Pawns, no. You see, in chess, pawns can be elevated to higher ranking pieces and, well, that won't happen to you, but thanks for playing.

I think this breaks down to a bully claiming, "that's not fair!"

Civil War

or in Western terms, Smear the Queer.
Hezbollah has the ball, and it running with it. Hez is going, going, going ... oh! Hez is smashed out and the ball is recovered by Hamas. Hamas is running now, running and is knocked off his feet by Hez. Hez and Hamas are really fighting now, but wait! Here comes Sunni. Sunni, remarkably snatches the ball away and is charging down the field. He doesn't see bin Laden off the right and it taken out -- ouch! Body check. Ooh! bin Laden fumbles with the ball ... it skitters away.
Out of nowhere, Iran himself comes off the sideline -- illegal by the way, and snatches the ball off the ground and is heading away. He stops to announce his victory and spouts some rhetoric and pow! Hez, Hamas, Sunni, Shiah dive on him like free tea! The ball is hit up in the air.
-- This game is brought to you by petty fighting and inconsistencies in supposed religions loving God and mankind; now, back to our game --

Hezbollah brings out a weapon. Uh, oh ... the others are worried. Hack! He cuts off his own hand! Shiah, not to be outdone pulls out a weapon and cuts off his arm and stabs Hez. Sunnis are desperate now ... instinctively, he pulls out a gun and shoots madly into the air, then the crowds, then Hez and Sunni, wounding them seriously.
bin Laden looks unafraid and drops a grenade. Time widdles away, yet they all stand.
Hamas smiles grimly, opens his shirt revealing explosives equaling his body mass. Just before the grenade explodes, Hamas kills everyone.
While there isn't a winner here, Hamas claims victory of the field -- for what's left of it -- crater.

naughty bits

comics by Julia

Nerf birder

SWAINSON'S HAWK 2
Originally uploaded by R Baxter.

SWAINSON'S HAWK according to the poster. This person has some really excellent photos. If only I were so lucky and talented.

Blog Master General

I'm not the blog master general! Well, you ought to have that title! I gave up reading your blog ages ago. If I were to try to read it, which I don't, I would have to take up speed reading, for there are tens of entries daily.

Yes, yes, yes. If I had a job, I'd blog less. So, if you know of a job that pays okay, let me know and I'll blog less, work more and be happier all around. Thank you,
please remit 42 cents for mailng US snail mail.

bang bang bang on the windows

I saw the movies Birds and wonder if the wretched things are playing out that movie now. They are wacky crack funky with slamming into windows. Hey -- birdie -- there isn't a sky in here. I would estimate around twelve hits a day on the window -- around the number of hits my blog gets. Birds and the blogs -- irony.

James Potty

James Potty realizes that locking the bathroom door, really wasn't a good idea, esspecially after 36 iced teas.

James Potty finds a Plumber has left him a card for his constantly running toilet.

see originals here

girl prepares strip cam

girl prepares strip cam
Originally uploaded by MDH, II.

another caption would be: "word web cam" and word, "stripper" complimented with picture, generates hundreds of hits.
Hey -- want traffic to your site -- include these words. Of course, the family blog might get lots of traffic for pleasure seekers, but ... that's the cost.

I'll fit this right in under the diaper changing story.

Cerpicio's Fire

0808062034.jpg
Originally uploaded by Cerpicio.

I love fire, not pyromanic (sexual arrousal), but I wasn't involved here. This is impressive, sorry that I wasn't part of the action.

We could play some "Fire Woman" by Cult, or "Fire ..." by Iron Butterfly

It could have been titled, "[my name] in charge of small campfire". "Benchwarmer exceeds expectations."
"Small housewarming"
"Audience Awed by Large Fire Display"; eh, it works.
Local artist fires up ceramics in schoolyard.
It says here to, "heat polymer to correct temperature before applying"
Conan impersonator dies, mournful crowd attends funeral pyre.

Thanks Cerpicio for the picture for catchy titles.
Blaze at 11:00.

+ Big Worm is character from Friday

Big Worm politics

When your playing with my money, your playing with my emotions! Don't mess with me Smokey!
If you think about it, congress isn't that far from Big Worm. One of his last statements, after taking a boy's money without giving him his ice cream treat was, "My money!"

Canada and US call truce

Canada, seeing that the US has greater firepower in the way of Dixie Chicks as being annoying, has agrred to withdraw Celine Dion from the US when the Dixie Chicks are pulled back to the US.

I like big bucks and I cannot lie

You working people cannot deny

Man, Monster (Jobs) ain't got nothing to do with my selection ...
"comission sales, underpaid labor, unskilled trades", huh! Only if it pays 5-3 ($53,000)!

So your job offers potential money, and claim that it ain't funny,
well funny don't pay no bills o'mine, my bills don't want none unless you got cash Hon!

Give me a CNN job -- Real Cash, Real Fast (as long as it's legal)

Go West!

Pioneers now, the Schellenbachs will be going West, well, very western Illinois. Doesn't that just pan out to typical reality? There you are, well settled in your house, life, job ... now a family of three and POW, you plan to move. Life either kicks you or is getting kicked by you. Hmphf!

Dear K.,

I hope that this larger firm pays for relocation or compensates you for your move of faith! I'm sure you took it knowing the changes. It'll be sad to see you four (your doggy too) moving farther. I don't know anything about where you're heading, only -- that it is NO CHICAGO. You might have some better travel though.

I sent your webpage to my brother-in-law, who's a department chair for AUTOCAD, AUTODESK (etc.) classes and training at IVY TECH (South Bend). Hopeefully, his students see your work, and listen to your podcasts.
.....
Though not needing cowboy boots and spurs, they might need to adapt to the locals ... changing customs. "You ain't from 'round here ... is ya?"

Cerpicio gets me to laugh

Yesterday, I got a call from Cerpicio and it started with a job tip for me, as I'm still looking for a job. It concluded with [drum roll please], "What are you doing on the 26th? You see, we're moving and, uh ..."

It therefore makes my year complete ... helping at least three different people/families move. For the last four years, I have helped at least three people/families move each year -- not always the same families. It appears to be as constant as the seasons.

Thanks Cerpicio for the great laugh and I'll be there to help you, your wife, and your cats move. BTW: MR called me on Monday and asked me directions on how to do a driveby on your house. He drove by and viola! He saw the present homeowners there. I hope there isn't a CQuin incident there.