Suesses of Foxes in Soxes with Sneeches

Green Eggs & Ham anyone? Would you eat them with a Fox? Perhaps eat them on beaches with Sneeches (part 1 of 2) or with Sneeches (part 2 of 2) on beaches?

YouTube has stars upon thars!

Scout

I just didn't like the blurry picutre he had.

Well, that's the name MR gives her. I usually called her by her name. I used to pester her with "Confuse-Us says" notes while gurgling down lots of beers. Needless to say, my handwriting worsened as did my notes. It was great to hear that she got out of being bartender and is now going to get married.

Cinderella story, c/o MR is here.

Selling addictive materials

I decided that I couldn't do it. I can't sell drugs ... I can't sell tobacco. It would be apocalypse for me.

Wrong man

I looked at the job and thought, "Sweet! I could do that job." I got the short end with, "applicant has too much body."+
Again, I thought, "Sweet!"
I was corrected again that "too much body" wasn't flattery.

Come to find out that it was a mechanics job. Wow! I'm so sore.

+ I suppose this is only marginally better than, "applicant doesn't have enough body".

Old man Winter got tuckered out

These are two separate shots, taken within seconds of each other. The winter looks mean, but it was all wind. Today, hours later, the streets are cemeent, only wetness to remind anyone that it snowed at all. In other parts of the country, winter frozen and dumped and smoted cities. Here, we were dusted with snow, beaten lightly with wind, but suffer only from the gray gloom of winter.

Today, we got sun! Sun, glorious sun!

Directions here!

Cerpicio has been leading people to my blog. Thanks! "Toxification" got me hits and [word] [word] farting got me a hit also.

"I see skies of blue, grass of green ... and I say to myself, what a wonderful world!"

job I don't have

MR told me a password to his computer, so I type it
blop blop blop

nope

blop blop blop

nope

carefully

blop blop blop

OK
..........
Apparently I can't do data entry either.

Totally Awesom

wasn't awesome or extreme or ... wait. No, it was extreme (ly) bad. I stopped watching. I brought it over to MR's house and we stopped watching it in favor of Catch Phrase.

NNTN helps you choose a beer

Master Meister Munchin Monster Brew Ale ha ha ha

bad segway

Do you enjoy music?
Local driver/delivery person wanted for Indiana’s leading piano dealer.

 

So, who cares if you do or don't like music?  This person is a truck driver.  What if you are deaf?  Bad ... bad, idea for salespitching this job.

commercials

Comcast must have hired the advertising firm that Geico uses.

Save big bucks -- lifeguard does CPR to male deer
Save el Moulah -- tragic
Save cabbage -- Coast Guard hauls heads of cabbage from water

I guess the next will be dough (pizzaria with half a loaf pushed aside),
keep your smack -- getting slapped back
keep your wallet fat -- growing wallet tipping over man who's seated
enough to buy more ice -- features someone buying a glacier
keep ching for bling -- bank bag full of coins to jewelry store

Do you think I'm kidding? Watch 'em pull a bad idea out of a hat.
"That trick never works!"
"Presto! (lion growling). I mustuv got the wrong hat."
"Now here's something we hope you'll really like."+

+ Rocky & Bullwinkle

Toy?

During the past 5 plus years designing toys you have strategically developed innovative and breakthrough ideas from concept to execution. The design of toys is in your blood and you have an awesome portfolio that will confirm this. Your ability to create amazing illustrations by hand AND by computer is second to none. You also possess a very strong knowledge of the toy and animation industries.

If this is a mirror of your experience, please send resume and DIGITAL portfolio to: this company here.

So, Tom Hanks' character got this job; chopsticks in the store and beta testing before full product production and release. Ah to be a creative engineer and perpetual boy. One half doesn't cut it.

sliken new blahs

I have applied to places and been given no feedback -- grrr. I will note for those just entering the application race that FW is hardly hiring. Lafayette, Indianapolis, Chicagoland, and Columbus, OH are hiring. For the right area/discipline, Cincinnati is hiring.

I have seen a lumber company that either has the highest turnover rate possible, turnstyle employment or they select one person out of a thousand and interview only that one person. In any case, the company, I won't use the name, has had the same job opportunities listed for months. That shows something and I don't think it's positive.

Another field that is "growing" to be a bother is insurance. If I had an insurance license and an interest in selling what people don't need from a company that will likely find loopholes to paying, then I could have a job with at least three companies similtaneously. I could be Ned Ryerson (Groundhog Day) -- "Bing".

In the end I find myself being Skeelo, "I Wish"

spy network

I was looking for Casine Royale and instead got Casino Royale. Is that how it always works?

Worst Witch

I found at library the DVDs of Worst Witch, a BBC series. The DVD cover proclaimed, ideas that helped make Harry Potter. That's a bold claim, but ... I will second that motion. I only watched one episode, but many of the specifics are indeed Potter-esque.

Girls' school in a castle, all are witches, and Mildred and friend are rule-breakers. These young witches are plucky with their magic and it is tabboo to use magic, as they are not trained.

Two characters stood out in the show: PE Coah who might have been the basis for Madam Hooch and there was a little girl who looked like a blonde young Moaning Mertle.

(I stopped as I had to laugh about "hooch" and "moaning". It is a penalty to have watched Porky's and other movies.)

There are about fifty girls there, I think and it surprises me that two girls can go missing for such a long period without being noticed. As a teacher, especially while at recess -- track all your kids, the kids of the other class you have and make sure you bring everyone back, despite other groups/classes being out there at the same time. If you can't keep track of fifty kids in one building while in line, then you are a shambles of a monitor.

Anyway, I tend to give kid shows a higher ranking unnaturally, as MR has noticed and remarked, but I'll put this one at slightly below average. While the acting is as good as it can be, fairly good considering it's a TV series, it lacks fluidity. Sometime I'll read some of the books.

family of Gustafson?

I flipped through channels yesterday, finding nothing, but stopped twice on quite flashes of landing that one big fish on fishing shows. I watched fishing shows when I was young, but it clicked early -- hey, they're spend a lot of time jabbering away and not catching fish. At other times, the editing clearly mixed different times of the day and seemingly different lakes. More disheartening was the fisherman who lands a 17-ton monster, shows it with pride that pops that baby back into the lake. In my head, "He's releasing Nessie. What gives?"

Anyway, an ice fisherman who caught and was laboriously landing a huge lake trout was Gustafson. I remembered the name distinctly from Grumpy Old Men. So, here this guy was, not in New England, ice fishing. It was too tragically funny. Later some older guy came up to help him land it. I didn't hear the playful, demeaning banter of "Putz", "bite me", "eat my shorts", or any of Meredith's more classic one-line phrases for sexual intercourse.

Dare to be stupid

No, not Weird Al, who actually is quite a smart and talented man. No, this Nate Dogg (who apparently panders to the poor spelling urbanites) isn't clear whether he signed contracts or not, but is suing anyway+++. So, um ... what would you say you do here, exactly.

Well, I'm never here on time. I'd say in a week I do about 15 mintues of actual work.

Oh, you mean like sing.

I don't sing.

Oh, then you play an intrument.

I don't play instruments.

So ... what ... do, skip it!

+++ "Then there was this (sung 'total eclipse of the sun') and I saw a plant that I could swear wasn't there a minute ago, but the old man sold it to me anyway for a $1.25" Little Shop of Horrors

cartoon dieting

From now on, Bobbalou , I'll be doin' the thinin' around here!
"Kabong!"
"Hi-ya!"

I don't think I'll stick with it, but I hope to drop some weight with regular moving. Winter hasn't given me the hours of sheer joy with shoveling out the plowed in ice-drives of mine and neighbors. Four years ago --- hours upon hours upon hours. That was a workout! I used the snowblower, but the plows would encase the end of the drives in packed ice. Great!

I'll just consult the Hong Kong book of weight loss...
Thanks Scatman!

sign of dweebishness

Monkeyjack had a formula ("I've got an angle, Charlie")+ for calculating after sale costs on eBay auctions. He didn't use excel, but the google spreadsheet app showed the formula. I use excel and tested it to its limits, never having a fast enough machine to get it to do the heinous calculations of 3 years. I later saved results rather than calcluations. Anyway, I looked at the 22 character formula and said, "just like PASCAL". Wow! That's a dead language. I thought COBOL was too, until I saw job postings for it. My brother-in-law understood, from his brother that banks still use it.

Yikes! That's like using druidic code or Latin. That langauge is not developing. COBOL ++ or .COBOL, I don't think so.

+ one of the two funny skits of Heavy Metal, 1976

Hours spent

So, Monkeyjack mentioned EM and his "turn taking" lasting an hour in 'planning' before doin' jack-diddly-squat.

"I remember going to [unsavory locale] Taco Hades, getting back, eating, watching MTV and still -- he had not moved." Ah, Axis & Allies, the takes-forever game. It's more strategy than chess, with that disastrous loki known as lucky dice. You rolled thirty friggin' ones! You blankity blank blank (goes on) cheater! How the! And the game is won by the US that is mostly just a buffer who sends bombers to the UK ... much like the real WWII.

Monkeyjack also reminded me that one evening, leaving the board with all the pieces placed (marking locations, units and their numbers, cash, etc.) Walker had nicely cleaned up the game so that the boys could eat breakfast. Hours -- lost. That was a game I remember playing until 5 am, seeing Goldie in the morning, offering toast, pancakes and cereal. Top it off with some Hi-C, please! Poor John, still in HS, playing until 5, 30 minute trip home, then off to boring senior year. We weren't too kind to him on his last year.

If memory serves me well, Jeff tended not to do the marathon nights like John on school nights.

My father and I used to play the game, 3-5 hours, split over two days. There was a spare room, unused otherwise that was a nice place for the board -- a game in progress.