spoilers

Well, I saw a picture of statements printed on car windows divulging some ending statements about Deathly Hallows. I will correct them, as they are a little erroneous.

Voldemort marries Snape, they have three children.
Hagrid kills Harry
Hermoine and Ron kill each other because each thinks the other is a stupid "git"
Neville seriously wounds Rowling for bad parts in her books.
Dumbledore was really hidden underneath a coin in a study and wasn't actually dead.
Uncle Vernon contracts cancer and has a change of heart -- ha ha.
The Death-Eaters rename themselves the Trans-fat avoiders.

Okay, they are all lies.