Like I was Dolemite

Gosh! It sure sounds legitimate!
If your daughter falls for this one, the error lies in her thinking.

changes

I got a request for a blog to be removed ... done

game with obvious task

game: kill everything

My sister sent me this

I highlighted the funner parts. Sadly, this is our taxes dollars and private funding here folks. I suppose the followup report that the fish had a "favorite" position, the fish-style?
The news was shown on Earthlink.

job posting

We are seeking a doctor. The doctor doesn't have to have a mastery of English, because we surely don't.

"Finster! How many times have I told you not to play with knives, and guns, and brass knuckles, and ..."

Type-crash dummies?

Gettin your xyxyxyxy a10shun I types good, c?

While the letters break up the pattern of listing after listing, it makes you look moronic.

Worth the votes

Now we vote in 2010, right?

drinking yields mastery of silly walks

I suppose if you had enough of these you could excel any silly walk without the government grant, though John Cleese might still give you "a run for your money".

Thanks ISJ for sending this to me!

Faceplantbook

Kaboom!

Thank you John McPherson of Close To Home for this cartoon!

protection battle

My sister, some time ago, had some issues on her computer. I ran a virus scan on Norton, then downloaded and ran a Spyware Doctor scan. I would and do use them both, but clearly on the Virus Protection Deathmatch, Spyware Doctor found many more and I would rate more effective this time.

You know the rules, when the mouse clicks, come out fighting computer problems.

Yes, please -- shut up!

Keanu and much of Hollywood. Would you please, please, please shut up?

If you are chatting with oppressive governments, especially shut up!

Oh Mama!

We need oversight and we need to put lawyers to work. The road will be fixed as soon as more bills are examined by our professionals who specialize in skimming through law and passing law when it pays them.

Obama, you approved this? Well, Democrats, what have you got to say for yourselves?

We received your payment of $100 Trillion. Unfortunately, the bill to keep us in the style of living to which we have grown accustomed is much higher. If you would like auto bill pay monthly for $10 Trillion, please sign up on our website: goldenparachutes-ucktheworkers.com

owned

Muahahahahahahahahahahaha!
The funniest things are true!

I am now free, but I was owned before. I guess that makes me pre-owned.

Missing

My mind, for I have posted something without reading. Thank you MR for correcting me on this error.

google video chat

Late night chat:

Well, I like google video chat. It works just fine. Tawnya and I chatted last night and as you can see she showed her lovely grin and twinkling eyes. This afternoon I did a screen capture, but somehow I stupidly replaced that on the clipboard with some text -- so I lost her talking with me after her haircut. She looked very pretty and I let her know.

The - in the corner is where my video PIP would be, but I minimized it to concentrate on her.

She is clothed, it just looks like she isn't.

answering MR's question

I was holding up a peace sign after drinking Captain Morgan with Pepe Le Pew showing who is stinkin' drunk.

about 1 hour away

If by one hour away you mean hours and hundreds of miles away. Did you guys enter anything right in the job description? Did you know that sometimes cities with the same names of different states aren't really close?

I would liken this to Broadway. Broadway, NYC is much different than Broadway in my town.

Easter, thumper

Happy, uh, Easter?

no thanks to you

Well, I tried to help some place look better, English error, with a comment, but I got this instead. Sheesh! "No respect; no respct at all!"+

+ Rodney Dangerfield