Well deserved

I do wrong and deserve the berating I get. So, I deserve the Hell that I calming walk to visit.
It's a shame ... I'll miss Heaven.

On the same path, eagerly walking to Hell ...

I made the day of a girl who had a nasty one ... she called me wanting to thank me, so sweet

I turned on my phone too late (I turned it off at work in the afternoon to save my battery), a friend was in trouble and desperate. He was out of sorts ... confused (from alcohol or drugs) needing help. In the end, his distance too great for me to reach him quickly, I sent officers to do a wellness check on him. I will try again today to check on him.

I am a little help to a person feeling quite alone, okay make that a few people who feel alone and desperate. One particular girl is a survivor of many hellish child experiences. I will never forgo being her friend, as she needs friends. I just wish I could live a life where she could have a "safe haven" being free to walk in, sit, and talk with me.

Loneliness ... a sad curse. Apparently there is a vast amount of loneliness despite the number of people on the planet. Of course, if you can't be yourself around someone, then you are still alone from yourself.

I have met lost souls and persons with many pains casting long shadows on the ground. I have had the opportunity for some people to cast their shadow on me ... let go of some of the past, giving it to me to remember and them to forget. I never wanted the burden, but it is nice to take the load for someone so loaded and often so young.

If I existed only to carry the sadness of others, it would destroy me. I am thankfully that I am also reminded that I am loved despite my evil nature, despite that I do wrong. Being loved, truly loved, is what a soul ultimately wants.