entertaining nomenclature

talented: stupid
bitch/jerk: smart
stupid: stupid
bold: stupid, endangers others or self
bright: dim-wit, with drug-activated intellidence
new: untainted, yet
innovative: untalented, but required to promote
rising star: minute 11 of 15 minutes of fame
crtiics love: avoid like spoiled fruit
scientologist: at level of branch davidians or Hale-Bop
civicly involved: shops locally
humanitarian: serving community service for E-felon or misdemeanor
beautiful: after sixteen hours of prep-work by un-named make-up artists, person resembles photoshopped person
real: completely fake
troubled: would sell liver for another hit, but still would favor Gucci over starvation