Racked with blame

for all I've done, seen and heard but did nothing about it, inaction that lead to pain and suffering. It's all here, pulsing like a very restful heartbeat ... thump (guilt), feelings of completion, thump (guilt), why can't I concentrate, thump (guilt -- fear), I'm angry about what, thump (guilt -- answer my call, I'm not going away), I'm breathing heavier now ... no rest for the wicked

What can I do to solve it ... accept that I'm wrong, that I should strive to avoid doing it again (thump, thump) and [explitives here] stop it!!! Hate -- anger ... guilt is a mighty hunter, always winning with a conscious-bearing prey. I know I've always had one, but this little nymph grew, no longer the size of a child, but now my size and still growing. A conscious that is stronger sometimes than want and wont, it will consume the ills and the passions, but the change will be good.

My ill-will exposes itself now, as Blogger indicated failure to connect! [insert foul language here]

Male pattern boredom

I think it would be safe to say that most of the guys I know would say, "No ... that's okay. I had that yesterday. I'm interested in something else." That's true not only of a dinner, but say, a movie, a TV show, music, entertainment, whatever. Tap, tap, tap ... driving her mad ... scratch, scratch, scratch ... "nervous" habits making her twitch. So what do you want to do? I don't know, but ... not the same as yesterday. I guess we could watch a movie, but I'll probably get up a few times in the middle of it to answer the phone, call on the phone, check my email ... eat something ... I'm not likely to sit there this cold day and sit, sit, sit, sit.
Be it bold adventures or simply a change, the hunter still lurks, still hunting, poised for the strike -- the big thrill; the moment; culmination of all his skills; lovin' or the remote.

Gee thanks dear for the remote. I was hunting for the other.